OUR NUT HOUSE

Houdini and the Follower

2011-11-11T12:21:00.001-07:00

Meet Hershey and Lilly! We added these two cute faces to our family on September 23rd 2011 after the tragic deaths of Daisy and Pokey. Lilly and Hershey are sisters, and as such are able to share a cage and look a LOT alike. However, on closer inspection, Hershey (on the left) has a darker coat and a lot more white speckles on her neck and face...
And she has that mischievous gleam in her eye.
I should have noticed that on day one...but I was just too taken back on how soft and cute and soft...and...well...soft she was.
She was masking her true personality.
We will get to that a little later!
Hershey is my daughter Emmi's bunny and Lilly is mine.

Here are Daisy and Pokey. Daisy was my bunny and is the same breed as our new bunnies, a mini-rex. We called her our "cow bunny" because she looked like a black and white cow. Daisy was a fun loving and friendly bunny who liked to do flips in the air. Pokey was my daughters bunny and was a mixed breed. She was a mini-lop and rex mix. While she wasn't as soft as Daisy, she had floppy ears that she didn't have full control of. It was seriously cute.

Daisy lived in our laundry room in a makeshift cage for 3 years, Pokey lived in a separate but similar enclosure in our laundry room for four years. The biggest issues we had with Daisy and Pokey were that they didn't get along after about fifteen minutes, so we couldn't put them together. Daisy liked to chew on everything: pine cones, wood, furniture, your shirt....etc. Pokey on the other hand liked to pull at the carpet. OH and he once peed in mid-air on my nephew.

This is our other family member, Tipsy. Tipsy was a gift from a college boyfriend during I time in my life when I was dealing with a lot. Tipsy has been part of my family since April 1997 and has pestered, bugged, woken me up, attacked me, meowed until I was deaf and cuddled up with me in bed ever since. So pretty much, he is just like my child.

Tipsy is very territorial and does not like other animals. So when I decided to get rabbits I was a bit nervous as to how he would react. The first few months were iffy, but then Tipsy warmed up to the bunnies (as much as Tipsy can warm up to another animal). His favorite bunny to play with was Pokey. The two of them would chase each other around the family room. Tipsy would bat the bunnies ears and then the bunny would paw at the cat. It really was cute.
And then our precious bunnies died within three days of each other the beginning of September. At first I didn't think I would ever get rabbits again, but by the end of September my daughter had talked me into looking for new family members.

Meet Hershey. Hershey is my daughters rabbit. She looks so cute and innocent. HAHAHA! She and Lilly share an enclosure similar to the one our previous rabbits occupied.

The floor has a plastic tablecloth with a thick plastic over the top. A pet exercise pen is used as a perimeter with their cage in one corner and a litter box in the other.

For four years we had rabbits in this enclosure with NO PROBLEMS.

Within one week Hershey had escaped.

I was floored. One hour there were two rabbits, the next there was only one.

At first I thought there was an opening in the enclosure she escaped through so I made sure it was snapped together tightly and then went upstairs.
The next day she got out again.
We figured out that she would climb the water bottle (which at that time was hooked to the outside of the cage) hop onto the cement ledge in the basement and then hop down to freedom. Pretty smart rabbit.
So we moved the water bottle.
A week later she got out again!
At this point I changed her name to HOUDINI!

So I added a partial cover to the enclosure that attached to their cage. The cover can be lifted to feed them, but keeps the rabbits from using the leverage of their cage to climb out.
I week later she escaped again!

I was puzzled, so I sat downstairs one night for over an hour, watching the bunnies and noticed that Hershey would stand on her back feet and try and climb the cage.
Yes, climb!

So I found an old window screen and put it over the whole enclosure.

A week later....
Yeah, I know, you get the picture by now.
She found freedom again, and again and again.
Each time I would add another think to the cage to try and keep the bunny in.
By last night her enclosure looked like this:

A far cry from how it had been for four years. Hershey had managed in one week to do what our previous rabbits had not managed in four years.

And what about Lilly. Well this whole time she had remained in the cage, like the obedient bunny I thought she was.

Until last night!

I'll get to THAT story in a minute. First I have to tell you that last week I watched as Hershey (aka Houdini) was giving Lilly escape lessons. He would stand up against the cage and then wait until she did the same. I even watched in horror as Hershey climbed on Lillys back and then stood up and put her paws on the top of the enclosure.
Good Grief! That rabbit is going to be the death of me.

So last night I am awakened by sounds upstairs (we live in a split level home with four levels...the rabbits are on the basement level, our bedrooms are on the top). Since our cat Tipsy enjoys waking us almost every night with his nocturnal prowling, I lifted my head, hollered at the cat and then proceeded to go back to sleep, only to be woken up twice more.

By the third time I decided that the cat was going to spend the rest of the night in the basement so I could sleep, but as I jumped out of bed I watched as the cat ran one way and something else ran the other way... or hopped the other way. Keep in mind that up until this point every time Hershey had escaped she had stayed in the basement.

So I flip on the hall light only to realize that the offending rabbit is none other than Lilly...my sweet innocent bunny who had never escaped before.

So I pick her up, take her to the basement and put her in the cage, only to realize that there are NO bunnies in the cage, Hershey too has escaped.

30 minutes later we found Hershey in a garbage can.....She had managed to hop off of the cement ledge into the laundry room trash can and then tip it over...trapping herself.

Needless to say, at 10:00 this morning I bought one of these.

YELLOW HEADED BLACKBIRD HEAVEN

2011-05-07T08:47:00.005-06:00

For five and a half years I have been enjoying seeing these big guys at my bird feeders and they quickly became my favorite bird. They are Yellow Headed Blackbirds. I was a little confused when a few years ago I looked in our Utah bird book and saw that they are marsh birds. I couldn't for the life of my figure out why they came to my feeders but I figured they lived in one of the golf coarse water holes. But until last night I never went searching for them.

Each year we have more and more of them come visit out f

eeder along with the female

yellow heads. This year we had 11 males and 6 females, I assumed that was all there were...until I saw this.

There are HUNDREDS of the cuties living in a large marsh right by the clubhouse. I was in bird heaven, so of course I had to take a ton of pictures and walk around the marsh. I was amazed. If you get a chance to visit Eagle Lake in Roy...sto

p and enjoy my

bird family. it is quite an experience.

11TH BIRTHDAY

2011-05-02T16:40:00.006-06:00

Today I am the proud mother of a preteen and while the thought terrifies me, nothing scares me more than realizing I am two years away from a full-fledged teenager.

In preparation for the big day my daughter, who has a seriously funny sense of humor, decided that she wanted a "sheep" cake. Don't ask me how the fascination with sheep happened because I am not sure of the answer. All I know is one night I tucked my child into bed and the next morning I woke up to farm animal sounds. "baaaaaa" I decided to go with the flow and have learned, as any shepherd has, to know which animal sounds to ignore and which to come running for. I swear though, every few hours she has to let out a stray "baaaa". It's like she can't "baaa" control herself. Heaven help us all.

Anyway, back to the birthday. Where was I....oh yeah, she wanted a sheep cake. Okay, so we start calling the bakeries and all of them seemed to scratch their heads. "Do you want it 3D?" "A what cake?" "I will have to get back to you" It was really disconcerting when no one was able to help me. I scratched my head for a minute and then though....google images. LOL I was SURE my child wasn't the only person who had ever asked for a sheep cake so I logged onto the trusty internet and hit the mother load.

Once we found a few cake designs she liked I hit the local grocery store and asked if they could make a cake similar to the ones she liked and they said "sure". Here is the result.

Last night the family got together to celebrate the big day with ice cream and sheepy cake. My sister had the funniest comment of the night when she said "The frosting was a really sweet so I had to shear my sheep." LOL

My father, who just loves to tease people had a blast putting marshmallows under the large sheep's eyes for tears and under his nose for umm...well...you know.

Good times, good times!

Happy Birthday my precious child.....baaaaaaa

Mom

Charity's Homemade 3 Bean Chili

2011-01-22T18:34:00.001-07:00

1 (15 oz) Can Kidney Beans
1/2 Can Black Beans
1/2 Can Pinto Beans
2 Cans Diced Tomatoes (15 oz each)
1/2 Onion - chopped
1/2 Green Pepper- chopped
3 Garlic Cloves -minced
16 oz Tomato Sauce
1/4 Cup Ketchup
2 tsp Chili Powder
1 tsp Ground Cumin
1 tsp Oregano
1 tsp Salt
1/2 tsp Pepper

Drain juice from all cans of beans and rinse. Do not drain the diced tomatoes. Add all ingredients to a large pot and bring to boil. Boil for 15 minutes stirring occasionally.

Add 1/8 cup crushed Ritz Crackers

Serve and enjoy

***You can also cook in a crock pot on low for 6 hours or on high for 3 hours***

CHARITY'S ZUCCHINI BREAD

2010-09-30T09:30:00.004-06:00

3 Whole Eggs

1 Cup Vegetable Oil

1 3/4 Cups Sugar

1 Tablespoon Vanilla Extract

1 teaspoon Baking Soda

2 teaspoons Ground Cinnamon

1 teaspoon Salt

1/4 teaspoon Baking Powder

2 Cups Grated Zucchini

3 Cups Flour

Preheat oven to 350

Mix ingredients together in the order shown above. Mixing well between each ingredient.

Grease and flour two loaf pans.

Pour equal amounts of the mixture into each loaf pan.

Bake for 45 minutes or until the center is done.

CANNED MILD SALSA

2010-09-17T12:10:00.003-06:00

*This recipe uses fresh tomatoes from your garden, that is why I love it so much*

Makes about 6 Quart

24 Whole medium tomatoes
2 Bell Peppers
1 Red Pepper
5 Jalapeno Peppers
1 1/2 White Onion
1 Red Onion
12 oz Tomato Paste
1 Cup White Vinegar
1/2 Cup Sugar
1/4 Cup Salt
4 Tablespoons Cilantro
3 Cloves of Garlic (Minced)

The tomatoes need to be skinned. You do this by boiling water in a large pot and then putting the tomatoes in the boiling water for 20-30 seconds. Place them in ice water afterwards. Then you can peel them.
Cut all of the peppers and remove the seeds. If you don't remove the jalapeno seeds your salsa will not be mild.
In a food processor or chopper, chop the bell peppers, onions, jalapenos, garlic and the tomatoes. They can be chopped by hand, but the food processor is easier. Also I don't like my salsa really chunky, so the food processor works better for me. If you want chunkier salsa you can chop half of the vegetables by hand.
Put all ingredients into a large pot. Bring to boil and simmer for 25 minutes. This process boils off some of the liquid from the tomatoes.
Place the lids and rings into a small pot with water and bring the water to a boil. This will get the lids soft so they will seal better. Leave them in the hot water until you place them on the jars.
Also, start your water bath (canner) water on the burner at this time. It takes a while to get the water boiling.
Pour the salsa into jars, leaving an inch of air at the top of the jar.
Wipe the rim of the jars with a wet cloth to get any drips off and then seal them with the lids, making sure you screw them on tight.
Place the jars into a water bath and bring the water to a boil again. The water in the bath needs to be at least an inch above the jars. Boil the salsa for 20 minuets for quart sized jars or 15 minutes for pint sized jars.
Take the bottles out of the canner and place them on a towel. they will seal as the jars cool. You know they are sealed by pressing down on the lid of the jar. If it doesn't pop when you push on it then they are sealed.

GRILLED PORK CHOPS

2010-08-02T18:57:00.003-06:00

This is a great recipe for pork chops. I use the thicker boneless ones that are about as big as your fist.

4 Pork Chops
1/3 Cup Water
1/3 Cup Soy Sauce
1/8 Cup Oil
1 tsp Minced Garlic
2 Tbsp Lemon Pepper Seasoning

Mix all ingredients (except Pork Chops) together in a bowl. Add the Pork, cover and marinate for 1-2 hours. Grill and enjoy! Do not over cook the meat.

MAKING A QUILT

2010-07-26T20:19:00.004-06:00

This weekend was mommy/daughter activity weekend.

I love mommy/daughter activities.

My beautiful daughter wanted a new summer blanket for her bed. Apparently the feather comforter and duvet were too hot...go figure!

So a month ago we chose some fabrics and then have spent the weeks since choosing a design, deciding it wasn't "cool" and then choosing again.

.

On Saturday we got started and finished the top of the blanket. However, we had not decided what to put on the back.

Today we finished the blanket and it is pretty darn cute.

Now if she would only clean her room!

GOOD MORNING

2010-05-26T20:14:00.002-06:00

Hello my pretty! Do you know how much you brighten my day.

You sure look beautiful this morning with your bright yellow head and playful disposition.

And look, you brought me some friends today. They are pretty cute too.

But tell me something. Why is the mother of your children looking so very dull and boring.

It just isn't fair!

DANCE COMPETITION

2010-04-17T17:23:00.004-06:00

Emmi has been dancing since she was 4, and doing competition dance since she was 6. She is planning on taking next year off of competition so I am making sure I take video and pictures to record this year.
Here are some pictures from the last few competitions.

They had three team dances and one show routine. Today their dance "Light a Match" won three awards: !st Place/Platinum, Best Choreography & Overall Best Intermediate/Professional Dance.

They did wonderful. Only two more dance competitions to go!

THEY'RE BAAAAAAAACK

2010-04-07T11:37:00.005-06:00

All is right in my world today.

I looked out my kitchen window while rinsing out my cereal bowl.... and saw this:

It just makes everything right. My 5 male yellow headed blackbirds managed to find my home again. I hope they missed me as much as I missed them. I won't see the females for a month or more...I think that is because they are sitting on the nests...who knows. But my yellow-headed beauties will now greet me morning and night until the end of July.

It brightened my day.

EASTER WEEKEND

2010-04-04T19:25:00.013-06:00

(This snow-bunny was found hopping around Salt Lake City)

It has been a fun Easter weekend. Filled with family, fun and lots of food (of the sugary variety).

It was very VERY cold though!

Friday night it hailed!

Saturday my sister, BIL and I took the kids to Hill Air Force Base for the Easter hunt. I think we got hypothermia, but the kids had fun. (if you look close you will see remnants of the hail storm from the night before...there should never be frost on your Easter eggs...that is just sooo wrong)

Saturday afternoon was Great Grandma's Easter party. Lots of cousins showed up. It was a ton of fun!

(Brayden & Taiton)

(Mindy and Briella)

(Zach, Kylee, Emmi, Reece, Taiton and his friend)

(Averie and Joey)

(Kylee and Averie)

(Emmi)

Then today we did the hunting egg thing, colored eggs, microwaved a peep and then took a long nap. It has been a relaxing and wonderful day!

WEEKEND IN SAINT GEORGE/ ZION

2010-03-28T20:28:00.014-06:00

This weekend Emmi had a dance competition in Saint George. I'm not a Saint George lover, but I do have to say this is one of the best trips I've made that direction.
We headed out on Friday around 2, got into Saint George around 6:30, checked into the hotel and then headed out to find some food.

Yes, we know what is most important....food!

We ate at Brick Oven Pizza, at the end of the St George Boulevard. Yummmy! While we were eating a balloon lady came around and made Emmi "bunny ears". It was quite the fun dinner.

After dinner we went back to the hotel and crashed...I was so very tired from driving.

The next morning we were up early for the dance competition. Emmi had three team dances (Jazz, Lyrical, Jazz) and a show routine.

They placed first in all of the dances. Two of the dances were "high gold". I was so very proud of her, but the best part was that they had fun!

After dancing Emmi decided she wanted to swim for a bit.

Then we went on a tour of St George. I've been to the place many times but except for when I was like 14 and went with Janet Dodd and her sister, I really haven't done anything while I was there. So I decided to find the roads that took you to the top of the red rocks and take the roads that lead out of the city to the fun spots. I never found the road that took you to the volcanoes and the dunes, but that is okay....

I found THIS!

Now tell me that doesn't look like a face.... hahahahaha, I love it!

and we found these up on the top of one of the bluffs.

We had a blast that day just driving around and finding all sorts of cool stuff, mostly in the color reddish-orange, but since it isn't a common color up north we enjoyed finding new red rocks.

The next morning we were SUPPOSED TO eat breakfast, hop in the car and just come home. But at breakfast this morning one of the other families was talking about driving through Zion and Emmi decided SHE wanted to drive though Zion too. So I bought a map, called my mom and then took the LOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG way home.

But had we taken the normal route, we would have missed all of this!

(Look, she is sad because we were leaving)

Our 4.5 hour drive took 8.5 hours and 50 extra miles...not to mention the $25 freaking TAX they charge you to drive through the park, but it sure was beautiful. It was worth the extra time, even if I am extremely tired right now because of it.

We stopped at my parents on the way home and Emmi decided to show us how tired she was from the trip.

What a great weekend!

Now I'm off to bed.

Visit to the Mountains

2010-03-13T20:56:00.004-07:00

Last weekend one of my coworkers got married. After the ceremony Emmi and I decided to drive to the top of 9th street in Ogden and see the mountains. It was cold out, but the snow topped mountains were hard to resist. They looked so beautiful.

Emmi went exploring at the trail-head. She noticed lots of signs of foot traffic, and not just of the human variety. She decided that she wanted to live at the bottom of a mountain and then said she was cold.

I agreed. It was really windy and cold out.

We couldn't help but take some pictures. (Okay, so we took lots of pictures)

While I really hate the cold winters in Utah, it sure does make for some breathtaking scenery.

Enjoy!

(P.S. I love my new camera and I really really love my new zoom lens!)

WHAT IS MOST PRECIOUS

2010-02-28T17:39:00.003-07:00

Sometimes in life we have those moments when everything else around us seems to fade and we realize just how important certain people are to your existence.

I had one of those yesterday.

Yesterday Emmi went swimming to Surf and Swim (a local wave pool) for a friends birthday. While she partied I shopped. At 5:00 I went to pick her up and saw a fire truck parked next to the building. I didn't think anything of it because the police and fire station aren't too far away from the swimming pool.

So I get out of the car, walk into the building only to have a nervous 16 year old worker tell me I can't pick up my daughter that I need to leave the building immediately.

I was then grabbed by a fireman and escorted from the building. He told me I needed to wait on the far side of the parking lot and that they would evacuate the building when it was safe.

My heart stopped, but I reluctantly left the building.

I heard the sirens so I ran for my car to move it so I wouldn't be blocked in by police and fire trucks.

Then I stood at the back of the parking lot and waited.

My first thought was that someone had drown, my second was a gunman... I kept thinking that we had missed the Trolley Square shooting 3 years ago because I was too lazy and decided to leave the house later and then decided on the way that I didn't want to drive to Salt Lake. So as I stood in the parking lot watching firemen and police officers surround the building and enter it I could help but think "what are the odds'?

I was hoping that because the firemen were around and by the door that it was something else and not some freak-job with violence on the mind.

I was seriously freaked that my daughter was inside.

About 5 minutes later people started to evacuated the building so I started walking towards them, looking for Emmi and not seeing her.

When I got closer to the building I knew what the problem was.

I could smell the gas and BOY was it strong. The were taping off the parking lot and didn't want anyone to start their cars. At that time I was seriously glad I had moved my car. It had been parked right next to the building where they were not allowing anyone to get to their vehicles.

Although in hindsight, starting my car was NOT a smart thing to do. But I didn't know it at the time.

I was still standing back from the building watching the last of the people exit and getting more and more upset as the time dragged on. It looked like everyone was out of the building and cuddling in groups to keep from freezing to death. (wet hair and Utah temps in February don't mix well).

I still couldn't find my daughter and was just about ready to have a panic attack when she walked out.

They had come out another exit. They had to turn around and go back through another door to get out.

I don't want to ever again have the feelings I had while standing outside of that building yesterday. I was terrified! She is the most precious part of my life and I couldn't get to her when I most wanted to.

I hugged her extra tight throughout the night.

MY LITTLE VALENTINE

2010-02-14T17:38:00.003-07:00

This is my little valentine. She is 4 foot 10 inches tall with short blond hair, blue eyes and a feisty attitude.

For our valentine weekend we held the annual "cousin sleepover" on Friday night. The kids had a blast, as did I. We ate, played games, painted, watched a movie...and didn't get much sleep.

Then Saturday we did some clearance shopping. There is nothing like end of the season sales to get my blood pumping. We went out to lunch with some wacky people and then did some MORE shopping.

Today, valentines day, we slept in. I don't get to do that much so it was a real treat. Then we spent the day playing games and lounging around. I'm not feeling well today, so the lounging around really brightened my day.

Emmi built towers with the Jenga blocks after we played. She got pretty creative with her towers.

It was a GREAT weekend. I hope you each had a wonderful valentines day too.

JANUARY FUN

2010-01-31T14:41:00.006-07:00

"I love you too Emmi."

We have had a good January. I good start to the new year.
Life is really good at the 'Nut House' We are plugging away at life and doing the best to enjoy ourselves.

Some funny things this month....

Emmi is trying to learn to inline skate. Grandma and pa bought her these skates for Christmas and there has been WAY too much snow and ice and, well, cold, to want to attempt to learn.

Yesterday was a sunny day...not warm, just sunny... so we decided to try.

She did a great job.

A few weeks ago I was in bed and pulled back the covers to see THIS!

at first I freaked a little thinking they were bugs. But even though it looks nasty, these are a byproduct of my child crawling into MY bed at night while wearing these.

Hahaha, they left behind a LOT of fluffies.

It really was a great January. Emmi did 'climb the walls' a little (as did I, although not literally). Overall it was just one more fun and busy month at the nut house.

Emmi's Butt-Sliding Fun

2010-01-21T13:22:00.007-07:00

This past September my family went camping to Tony Grove in Utah. Behind our camping spot was this really cool landscape that had a tree who's roots were showing. It was so very pretty I couldn't help but take a bazillion pictures.

Emmi, my adventurous 9 year old, decided she wanted to climb up and touch the exposed roots.

She did so with my enthusiastic approval. (I'm a bad influence)

So she climbed down across the gully and up a mud and rock slide to the roots. She then begged her 10 year old cousin to join her. His parents weren't so excited about the idea.

So there is my child, standing on a rock slide holding onto the roots of an 80 foot pine tree. LOL, geez I'm a brilliant parent.
They stayed up there for a bit, holding onto the roots and thinking they were pretty cool.

However, what goes up....must...well, you know.

So the debate ensued. "Mom? How do I get down?"

"Same way you got up, only backwards."

"Moooooom, it is slick, how do I get down?"

Me in my brilliance said. "Well, you just slide down on your butt."

Makes sense...right?

Right!

Her cousin went first, and I'm really sad I didn't get that on video because geez he slid down that hill fast.

His parents were less than happy with my bad influence on their son. And how that influence impacted their sons jeans.

Then it was Emmi's turn.

Here is the video...I still laugh every time I see it.

I may be a bad influence, but I'm a GREAT mom and no one can accuse me of being a boring mom either.

Manicotti: My Favorite Food

2010-01-17T17:37:00.005-07:00

I love Manicotti....I mean I loooooooooooooooove Manicotti. It is my favorite food in the whole world. I have many, many, many recipes for the stuff, and while this is not my favorite, it is the favorite of my daughter.

Most people I know who don't like Manicotti don't like it because of the ricotta cheese. It is really a weird cheese with an odd taste that many people don't like.

This recipe doesn't have ricotta cheese.

EASY CHEESY MANICOTTI

8 ounces, fluid Chive And Onion Cream Cheese
4 ounces, fluid Regular Cream Cheese
3 cups Mozzarella Cheese, Shredded
¼ cups Shredded Parmesan Cheese (or 1/8 Cup Of The Grated Sprinkle Kind)
1 package Manicotti Shells (8 Oz Package)
1 bottle Marinara Sauce 24 Oz (or Spaghetti Sauce )
1 Tablespoon Parsley

* Preheat oven to 400 degrees

* Cook Manicotti shells according to the package. Drain the water. I put mine on wax paper after draining so they don’t stick together.

* Soften (in the microwave) both kinds of cream cheese. You want it softened, not cooked, so be very careful.

* In a medium bowl combine 2 cups of Mozzarella Cheese, Chive and Onion Cream Cheese, Regular Cream Cheese, Parmesan Cheese, and parsley. Mix well.

* Pour a small amount of the marinara sauce into a glass casserole dish. Spread it around.

* Fill the pasta shells with the cheese mixture. I find the easiest way to do this is to put a glop into your hand and roll it out into the form of a snake then slide it inside of the shell.

* Place stuffed shells into the casserole dish

* Pour the remaining Marinara Sauce over the top.

* Sprinkle with 1 cup Mozzarella Cheese

* Cover with aluminum foil and Bake at 400 degrees for 30-40 minutes.

Recipe makes about 10-12 stuffed shells.

HOLIDAY COOKING

2009-12-21T10:21:00.003-07:00

Mint Surprise Cookies
1 C Butter
1 C Sugar
1 C Brown Sugar
2 Eggs
1 tsp Vanilla
1 tsp Baking Soda
1 tsp Salt
3 C Flour
1 package Andies Mint Squares

* Preheat oven to 375
* Unwrap Andies mints and cut mint rectangles in half, making squares.
* Soften butter, add sugar, brown sugar, eggs, vanilla, baking soda and salt.
*Mix with electric mixer until smooth.
*Add flour and stir until mixed.
* Chill for an hour in fridge ( you don't have to do this but it makes it easier to form balls.)

*Spoon dough and roll around a mint square by using the palm of your hand. Cookie balls should be about 1 inch to 1.5 inch balls. The mint should not be showing.

* Bake 375 for 10-12 minutes.

English Toffee
1 C Butter
1/4 C Water
2 Tablespoons Karo Syrup (Corn Syrup)
1 1/4 C Sugar
1 Bag Semi Sweet Chocolate Chips
Smashed Walnuts
Candy Thermometer

*Melt butter in a medium size saucepan. You must use real butter for this.
* Add water, corn syrup, and sugar.
* Stir until boiling.
* Turn heat down a bit so that the sauce is still boiling but not extremely hard. (usually medium low)
* Put candy thermometer into the liquid. Make sure it is not touching the bottom of the pan.
* Cook to 285 degrees. This will take about 20 min or more.
* Pour onto lightly greased cookie sheet (must have four sides)
* The toffee will look bubbly for a minute or two but then will become smooth.
* Pour bag of chocolate chips on the top, wait for them to melt and then smooth them all over the toffee.
* Add crushed walnuts
* Allow the toffee to set, either by leaving it out for several hours or by placing it into the fridge. Once cooked and set you can cut it with a metal spatula or butter knife.

WINTER FUN AT THE NUT HOUSE

2009-12-13T09:30:00.009-07:00

Have any of you tried to make a gingerbread house lately?
Welllll, ummm, all I can say is good luck and have fun.

Emmi and I started making these three years ago. The first one was a tree and was fairly easy. Last year we made a train and I struggled with it, but still, comparatively speaking it was easy. This year Emmi wanted this cute little house.

The box showed a uniform house, with cute gumdrops all in a row and a checkerboard roof that made me say... "awww, that will be fun."

Boxes can be deceiving!

Very deceiving!

We started on the roof. I figured that if we started there and let it dry then it would be easier than trying to frost and decorate the roof when it was ON the house. This was a very good decision and I think the only good decision we made.

Next we put the house together. I used the decorator bag and piped frosting on the sides and then Emmi and I squished them together into a cute little box house. We held them for a few minutes and then let go. And it held. I was so happy.

We waited for a while for the house to dry and then decided to put the roof on. So once again I piped the edges with white goo and then carefully placed the roof on the house.

Only to find it didn't fit!

It freaking didn't fit!

I'm no architect, so I stood there for a few minutes, ticked off, trying to figure out what the crap we did wrong.

These things don't come with instructions you know.

Finally I realize that the side walls of the house should have gone inside the front and back parts of the house and we had done it wrong.

So I got a knife and cut the house apart and started over.

After letting it dry a second time we once again carefully placed the roof parts onto the house. I held them for a few minutes and then let go.

And the house fell apart!!!

It fell....It freaking fell down.

I guess it wasn't as dry as we thought.

So once again we took the house apart, put it back together and then I went to lye down and let it glue itself together.

For the third time we carefully place the roof on the house and the house held. But when I let go of the roof it started a slow downward crawl towards the floor.

I watched the sliding roof in horror, not quite knowing what to do. I really didn't want to stand there holding the roof forever until it dried, so we tried proping it up with jello boxes, cups and such. But it just kept sliding.

So we held the roof on.

And held...and held.

We let go and it seemed to stay. So Emmi finished decorating her roof with a row of gumdrops while I sat down and rested. LOL

When we finished with the house I stepped up to the counter for a look and wouldn't you know it, the freaking roof had continued to slide leaving a gumdrop gap at the top.

*bash head*

Emmi said next year she is getting out the hot glue gun and gluing it together. I think my daughter is brilliant.

However, even though our house is drafty and has a leaking roof and lopsided decorations...it is super cute.

On Friday we had our Great Grandma Christmas Party. My grandma does this every year and has since we were little.

Hi Grandma!

It is a tradition for the kids to put on a reenactment of Luke 2, the birth of our Savior. We did it every year that I can remember and now the torch has been passed to our children. The only difference is that when we were little we used sheets and robes. Last year my mom bought some costumes and I made like 10 costumes. It is so much cuter with the costumes. I wish I could be a sheepie.

Our star got stage fright at the last minute and the play must go on, so my cousin "took one for the team" (her words), and played the part of the star. What a bright and shinning star she is.

Last night we shoveled snow and my little one wanted to make a snowman. We tried to roll the balls of snow, only to have them fall apart. So we decided that we could pile the snow into a snowman instead.

Isn't it cute?

Look, she is an angel. *cough cough* *snort snort*

Meeting Ree Drummond

2009-11-06T18:46:00.006-07:00

Emmi and I went to Salt Lake on Wednesday to meet Ree Drummond (aka Pioneer Woman). Me in my stupidity thought we would only be an hour or two...hahahaha

We got home at midnight...on a school night. (oops)

Ree was so very cute, she even sang for us.

We stood in the 40 degree weather for lots and lots of hours. (Ree, I know it wasn't your fault)

Once inside we met this beautiful woman. This is Ree's sister in law. She is cute and funny and kept laughing at my daughter, who was so tired she was loopy.

Then we met Ree.

I really didn't get to talk to Ree. Why you ask? Well, because my daughter talked, and talked and talked.

What did she say?
"Can you make your website more boring so that my mom won't spend as much time on the internet and I can have more time?"

Ree's response. "Well, you like me a little bit don't you?"

To which Emmi said "I like your food."

*bash head*

I happened to snap a picture of the animated conversation between the two of them.

We were exhausted the next day, but it was worth it.

ROASTED PUMPKIN SEEDS

2009-10-31T14:04:00.002-06:00

In honor of Halloween, and since these are baking in my oven right now. Here is my moms recipe for pumpkin seeds (although I put more Worcestershire sauce in mine that she does)

Roasted Pumpkin Seeds
2 C Pumpkin Seeds
3 T Worcestershire Sauce
3 T Butter (real butter)
1 tsp Salt

* Wash pumpkin seeds getting most of the pumpkin off

* Melt butter in a small bowl.

* Add Worcestershire sauce to the butter and stir.

* Add butter mixture to the seeds and stir well.

* Spread seeds onto a LARGE cookie sheet (the cookie sheet needs to have sides or this won’t work)

* Sprinkle well with salt. I like to use the coarse salt but table salt works too.

Bake at 250 degrees for 2 hours or until crunchy

***If your pumpkin seeds are large you will need to bake them longer.

SUMMER IS OVER

2009-10-03T14:56:00.003-06:00

I can't believe it has been almost a month since I last updated this blog.

I guess I can make the excuse that life has been just TOO busy.

Our family took a trip to Tony Grove in Northern Utah. We camped, fished, floated in a canoe, went on a hike and just had a blast.

We have been picking our garden and canning salsa like crazy.
This double-stacked-stuck-together tomato came from our garden this past month.
As did the watermelon.

I also got to spend a Saturday with some of my favorite people in the whole wide world. Mary and Heather. We spend many years together in Jr High and High school.

And we have just been having fun. Summer has ended, the flowers are dying and the temperatures are turning cooler. So why not enjoy the last of the warmth.

CANNED MILD SALSA

2009-09-12T20:46:00.007-06:00

Do you have a truck load of tomatoes in your garden, or on your counter? Are you looking for an EASY-er Canned Salsa recipe. Have I got one for you. We like our salsa mild, but with taste. I've canned for several years and the recipes I have found have a bazillion different peppers in them and they just get too difficult. So here is a classic salsa that is safe for canning.

CLASSIC MILD SALSA
Makes 6 Quart

22-24 Medium sized tomatoes
2 Large Bell Peppers
1 Large Red Pepper
1 Large White Onion (make sure it is very large, otherwise use two)
1 Large Red Onion
1 Cup Finely Chopped Jalapeno Peppers (About 5-6)
12 Ounce (2 small cans) Tomato Paste
1 Cup White Vinegar
1/2 Cup Sugar
1/4 Cup Salt
4 Tbsp Cilantro
3 Cloves minced Garlic

1. The tomatoes need to be skinned. You do this by boiling water in a large pot and then putting the tomatoes in the boiling water for 20-30 SECONDS and then putting them in a bowl of ice water. Then you can peal them.

2. Cut all of the peppers in half (green, red and jalapeno). Remove all of the seeds and rinse them. If you don't remove the jalapeno seeds, your salsa will NOT be mild.

3. In a food processor, or chopper chop Bell Peppers, Onions, Jalapenos, Garlic and the tomatoes. They can be chopped by hand, however, the food processor is easier. Also, I don't like my salsa really chunky, so the food processor works better. If you want a chunkier salsa you can chop half by hand.

4. Put all ingredients into a large pot. Bring to boil and simmer for 25 minutes. This process boils off some of the liquid from the tomatoes.

5. Place lids and rings into a small pot with water and bring the water to a boil. This will get the lids soft so they will seal better. Leave them in the hot water until you place them on the jars.

6. Also start your water bath (canner) water on the burner at this time. It takes a while to get the water boiling.

7. Pour the salsa into hot jars (you get the jars hot from putting them in a sink of hot water),. You want to leave an inch of air at the top of the bottles.

8. Wipe the rim of the jars with a wet cloth to get any drips off and the seal them with the lids, making sure you screw them tight.

9. Place jars into a water bath and bring the water to a boil. The water in the water bath needs to be at least an inch above the jars. Boil salsa jars for 20 minutes for Quart or 15 minutes for Pint.

10. Take the bottles out of the water bath canner and place them on a towel. They will seal as the jars cool. You know they are sealed by pressing down on the lid of the jar, if it doesn't pop when you push it then they are sealed.

No Eyebrows

2009-08-25T21:05:00.003-06:00

So this morning my little girl, that precious beautiful girl of mine, decided she didn't like how "dark" her eyebrows were. So she cut them off.

I, of course, was horrified.

I am just very grateful she has blond eyebrows and not brown or black.

I'm also hoping they grow back before school pictures.

Before (This picture was taken a week ago)
Look at those beautiful eyebrows.

After (Taken tonight)

Do me a favor and try not to laugh too hard.

HELLO MY BABY

2009-08-21T08:36:00.003-06:00

"Hi there my little girl."

"Hi mom. Mom? Why are you taking these pictures?"
"I don't know baby, I just wanted to."

"Hi mom. You are weird."
"Yeah babe, I know. But you are so very cute."

MY STORY (Part 6) HAPPY ANNIVERSARY

2009-08-20T13:48:00.009-06:00

(Fall 2004)

So today is the day. 5 years ago today I was in surgery. “I’ve made it” as some at work have said. But really, my journey at this new life has just begun.

And now, the rest of the story

By three months post surgery I was finished with my physical therapy. They told me I was as good as I was going to get. I was no longer walking with my cane and had gained about 70% of the muscle activity back into my left leg. It would always be the weak leg and it would always have loss of sensation. My right leg was doing much better; I had 90% muscle use back and I could feel the whole leg except for my toes and an occasional spot or two. I hated physical therapy with a passion, so I wasn’t too sad to see it end. However the “this is as good as you are going to get” comment scared me, because, well….crap….I walked like a slow moving duck and hurt like hell. So REALLY, “this is as good as you are going to get” really sucked.

However, I was alive and I kept reminding myself of that. I had at least gotten that wish.

Two MRI’s were taken that year. They showed my spinal cord had gone from a slim crescent moon shape to almost a half moon shape. There was fluid left at the surgical site and the surgeon suspected that is what was causing the electrical jolts, but I had permanent nerve damage and permanent spinal cord damage. He told me that my cord would most likely never return to a fully round shape but that we would watch it and see.

I spent that first year getting use to my new life. Along with learning how to walk, I had to learn how to deal with the pain. My regular doctor was very helpful in this, however, I didn’t want to become dependent upon strong medications so I tried to take as few as I could. In all honesty, I probably inhibited my recovery by not taking the medications prescribed to me, but I needed to work and I couldn’t work and take care of a four year old when I was zoned out on pain killers. So I dealt with the pain.

My daily routine was hard. When I woke every morning I would have to give my body time to get going. I woke most mornings to numb legs and if I slept with my arms out or above my head they too were numb when I woke. I went to work and tried to put in a full day but by three o-clock every day I was useless. The muscles in my back were tense and pulling by then and my back hurt like a bugger. I also had headaches and leg pains. After work I would pretty much lye on the couch in intense pain until it was my daughters’ bedtime; then I would take the strong pain meds and muscle relaxants. Mornings were the best time of the day but my evenings were awful.

My little four year old girl was a godsend that first year. She became my little helper. She learned to become so very independent and helpful and rarely complained. And her little prayers at dinner and bed gave me hope.

“and bless mommy’s back that it will feel better.”
“bless mommy’s back that it will feel better so she can play with me.”
There were lots of “bless mommy” prayers,

there still are

(fall 2004)

It was a tough year, and I still couldn’t walk well. I looked at my future that first year with a lot of anxiety. I was grateful for being alive, but I wondered how long before my body gave up and gave out. I missed a lot of work that first year. I never knew how my back and legs would feel when I woke up and there were many mornings I woke up to find myself in excruciating amounts of pain and with legs that wouldn’t hold me. I was determined that within 5 years I would have to leave my job and be on disability. It made me sad and fearful.

At the end of year one I had another MRI which showed my spinal cord was still misshapen. It also showed that my muscles had not attached in the manner they were supposed to. The surgeon told me they had attached themselves to the surgical patch instead of to each other and so every time I moved my back muscles I was irritating my spinal cord. This was what was causing the intense back pains and my muscle spasms. It couldn’t be fixed without further surgery and the risks for that were too high. I would have to live with it until I needed another surgery. He told me that my spinal cord was as good as it was going to get and that very rarely do they change shape after a year. He also told me that getting pregnant again with my spinal cord that way would not be a good idea.

I was crushed.

But I was also grateful. While I have always wanted more than one child, I was so very grateful I already had become a mom and it was a blessing she was here. While my pregnancy was a difficult one, I had gotten pregnant while the tumor was small. Had I gotten pregnant a few years later when the tumor was bigger it could have had a horrible outcome.

(Christmas 2004)

Between year one and year two things started to look better. I was missing less and less work. I learned how to run, even though it was really only just small sprints and I walked with much more confidence than before. I had learned to get used to the tingling sensations and was starting to be able to ignore the constant nerve and muscle pains. I tried many medications trying to find one that would help with the nerve issues but after a while I gave up and decided I needed to get used to it.

At the end of year 2 I had another MRI that shocked the surgeon and even shocked me. My spinal cord had changed from a half moon shape to a misshapen round form. It was still damaged but the shape meant that it would be stronger and that it was working better. It was great news.

Four months later I pushed myself even further by embarking on a new journey. I purchased a home, with a yard. It was a very happy time for me. I had come so far and been able to accomplish so very much.

I didn’t know if my body was strong enough to be able to do the mundane things that home ownership brings…like mowing the lawn and shoveling snow. But my daughter needed room to play and a place to put a swing. Plus she needed friends.

And remember, it is always for her! Plus I had made that deal with the Lord that I would be the best mom I could be. Part of that is providing a good environment and home for your child.

(Spring 2006)

So in December 2006 we sold our condo, packed our stuff and embarked on a new and scary life.

Life as a homeowner, not a condo owner.

When I decided to buy a home I had a list, most people do. However, my list was based not on what type of countertops I wanted or how big of a master tub I felt I needed. (I still dream about a large bubble tub….awww). Nope, my list was based on what I felt I could handle. This is what was on my list:

Little, or better yet, no stairs. (Stairs are still very hard for me.)
Small yard (I didn’t even know if my body could handle mowing)
If the home was two stories, the washer needed to be upstairs,
A garage, so I wouldn’t have to scrape my car.

There were a few other things on my list, but those were the most important. The home I bought was so far from my list that it is almost funny. Our new home was on just over a fourth of an acre, had four stories with the laundry at the bottom level and the bedrooms on the top. But it did have a garage.

What was I thinking?

(Dec 2006)

I don’t know what I was thinking. I fell in love with the home maybe that was it. But whatever it was, I bought a home that I didn’t think I could care for. And within the first month of moving in, I had fallen down the stairs 5 times.

Since that day, back in December 2006, my life has changed for the better. I found that I can mow the lawn, and while it hurt to do it at first, slowly my body got used to it and my muscles became stronger. I found that I can also shovel the driveway, although that task has not been easy and gets harder every year.

But working on my home, my yard, my gardens, has brought my life so much joy and through it all it has kept my body active and healthy. Plus I have gained some of my confidence back. Confidence that I “can do it” or at least I can try to do it. I needed that back, I needed to feel good about myself and my abilities again.

So today as I celebrate my five year anniversary, I feel almost whole.

Yes I struggle daily with things that others take for granted. My balance sucks, I still have very little sensation in my left leg and both legs still have constant tingling sensations. I also still have constant back pain and nerve pain. But I feel like I have my life back. I feel like myself again. It is a new me, but it is me.

While I’m not able to do many things I enjoyed before this journey began I have learned to accept what I can do and ask for help with what I can’t do. And those fun things I can no longer participate in, I try not to miss them. I have adjusted to my new body and my new life.

I have been able to enjoy my life the way it is. I can walk normal now, I can run again, I can exercise and participate in some activities.

But most of all I have succeeded at what I wanted most in life. I can be a mom. And a pretty darn good mom at that.

Plus there has been no new regrowth of the tumor and no new tumors found.

It has been a long five years. Filled with anger and tears but I have made it.

I no longer feel that my life is hopeless. Yes there may come a day when my situation will change for the worse and yes I still have bad days and even bad months and sometimes even multiple bad months in a row. But I look to the future mostly with hope.

And with gratitude.

I am so very grateful that I was born in a time when medical science could fix my problem. I am so grateful I was blessed with doctors who were given the gifts and talents that led them to medicine. And I’m grateful to my family and friends for being there for me through this journey.

Here’s to the next five years

Thank you for allowing me to share my story with you.

(Fall 2008)

CREAMY CHICKEN AND BROCCOLI CASSEROLE

2009-08-16T12:35:00.003-06:00

Today's meal is brought to you by the letter "B"

B is for broccoli.

B is for broccoli that most kids hate and most adults love.

B is for bright green, my daughters favorite color (this month anyway)

B is for bright green broccoli that my daughter just picked out of her lunch.

B, B, B,

I love this meal, yes it takes a while to prepare (about 20 min) and another 25 to bake, but I just love, love, love the flavor.

We won't talk about the calories. Lets not talk about those little things.

Creamy Chicken and Broccoli Casserole
Serves 6

4-5 Chicken Breasts (cut up into bite sized pieces)
16 oz Frozen Broccoli
12 oz Can Evaporative Milk
8 oz Cream Cheese
1/8 Cup Chopped Onions
1/2 tsp Salt
1/2 tsp Garlic Powder
Pepper (as much or as little as you like)
1 Cup Grated Cheddar Cheese
1 tube Ritz Crackers

You will need 4 dishes for cooking this meal. 2 sauce pans (one for broccoli, one for the milk mixture) 1 skillet for the chicken and an 8x11 glass casserole dish

Empty crackers into a ziplock back and smash them. Set aside
Chop onion and set aside
In a medium sauce pan, over medium/low heat, heat evaporated milk and cream cheese until smooth
Add garlic powder to milk mixture.
While milk is heating, place raw chicken pieces in a skillet, add onion, pepper and salt to the chicken and cook until done.
While chicken is cooking, boil broccoli and then drain the water.
In an 8x11 glass casserole dish, layer chicken then broccoli. Pour milk mixture over the top. You may have to stir it to get milk on everything.
Top with cheese and crackers.
Bake at 350 for 25-30 min

MY STORY (Part 5) SURGERY

2009-08-14T08:04:00.007-06:00

“Does anyone ever get all the way to number 1?” I said.
He laughed and said, “No dear, they rarely get to 99.”

I laughed and looked up into his eyes. Then I asked my second question.
“Will someone hold my hand?”

Those were my two questions. Really stupid questions if you think about it. Most people might ask. ‘Am I going to hurt?” or “What happens if I feel the whole thing and can’t tell you?” Or geez even “Do you think I will wake up?”

Nope, I asked if anyone had ever counted from 99 all the way to 1. See, I’m even a smart aleck when facing death. But while the first question didn’t matter in the scheme of life, the second one did.

A nurse held my hand while the anesthesiologist inserted his needle into my IV, putting me to sleep. He said I could start counting….and I never got the chance. I never made it to 99. He was right.

I woke up in a weird room 11 hours later. My surgery was supposed to be a seven-hour deal…not eleven. However the surgeon had taken his time and by taking his time he was confident that he was able to get the entire tumor out. At some point he came in and explained that he had gotten the tumor out, but that he had also had to remove some bones in my back and a nerve along one of my ribs…the nerve where the tumor had started.

I had hoped for a few things upon waking up. I wanted to be able to feel my legs, both of them…right down to my toes and I wanted to be able to walk normally again and I wanted to be able to run and lift my daughter.

I didn’t get any of those wishes, but I was VERY grateful that I did wake up.

(Sharing these pictures is really hard for me...just know that. Not because of the fat rolls...hahaha But because it hurts me to look at them. Anyway, the cool thing about the pictures are the markings on my back....Notice how they marked each of my vertebrae in purple marker.)

(Sorry for the pictures, but some of you asked for them. Here they are. I have some of the inside of my too. However, since I don't want to gross any of you out, I'm not posting them. If you want to see them, you will have to ask for them and I'll send you an e-mail.)

I spent nine days in the hospital with my mom by my side the whole time. Nine horrific days. I was told that on day three I needed to sit up and try to stand. This may seem like an easy task, but now I know better. My spinal cord had spent the last several years…smashed. My body was used to that and the nerves in my spinal cord had adjusted to being crushed. Now there wasn’t any pressure on them and they were going haywire. My feet were burning, my legs were tingling, my back was KILLING me and I was cold, so very very cold.

On day three a horrible man showed up. He was the physical therapist…and the only person who took care of me during my hospital stay…that I actually hated.

It took me several tries but I managed to sit on the side of the bed. The pain was so intense and I immediately got light headed. I sat there for a little while, trying to adjust to being upright and then I stood up (with lots of assistance). I was only up for moment before I had to sit back down, that was al I could handle.

That night he wanted me to walk. I kept trying to tell him that the doctor told me to take it easy, to do this slowing…at my own rate. This man had no idea what I had been through and what I was feeling…he also didn’t know the definition of “taking it easy”.

I still couldn’t feel my legs completely. Taking the tumor out didn’t bring all or even most of the sensations back to my legs. I could feel my right leg and except for the tingling in the toes my right legs seemed fine, however my whole left leg was filled with stabbing pains, and I could barely feel my foot. There were also those issues with my nerves freaking out and the intense pain I now had in my back.

However he pushed and kept pushing and through tears I tried to tell him how much pain I was in and that my leg had sharp stabbing pains and that I was feeling faint and nauseated. He didn’t care. Not one bit. He just kept pushing, acting like I was being a baby. Just take a step, just do it, he would say. I had my hands on the walker in front of me and I was standing up. I told the horrible man that I really didn’t feel well and that I was light headed, and he still pushed me to take that step. So what did I do?

I took that step

And I passed out. I was in so much pain and my spinal cord was going haywire, so I passed out. Even after that happened he still treated me as if I were faking it. Oh I hated that man.

The next morning a girl I knew from college named Leiloni (I’m not sure that is how she spelled her name), came into my room. She was a physical therapist and was there to help me walk. I had been saved! I knew this girl, I had gone to church with this girl years before while in college. I knew she had a big heart and I knew she would care. With her and another woman they taught me how to take those steps, at my bodies own pace. And they helped me to be proud of myself with every baby step I took.

There were a lot of things I hated about that hospital stay. I hated being in so much pain, I hated that I had no appetite, I hated that I was reliant on other people and I hated that I was away from my daughter. But the biggest thing I hated was the nightmares and day-mares. The morphine injections were causing me to have these horrific hallucinations during the day and my nightmares were so bad that I was afraid to go to sleep. There was one night that I stayed up talking to my mom almost all night…all because I was terrified to sleep. It was awful.

One of the other big things I hated about the hospital was that I was cold the whole time I was there. My room was an oven (my poor mom), but my body couldn’t or wouldn’t regulate my temperature, so I froze and kept asking my mom to turn the heat up.

My mom stayed with me the whole time I was in the hospital. She took better care of me than the nurses…in fact, the nurses probably loves having her there because they didn’t have to wait on me much. I loved having her there though. It gave me such comfort to know that I wasn’t left alone for long periods of time. I loved the company and I loved that my mom was willing to sacrifice so much to be there.

And she was sick the whole time I was in the hospital.

Learning how to walk again was one of the hardest things about my hospital stay and the months and years that followed. I had gone into surgery with no pain. Before my surgery I had experienced maybe 3 backaches in my entire life. I wasn’t used to being in pain because, well, I had never had to endure pain. Not to this extent anyway. And even with the strong pain pills I was given and the morphine injections, the pain was almost more than I could take. I had pain from the surgical site, muscle pain from all of the muscles being cut in my back, nerve pain on my side, nerve pain in my right toes and my whole left leg and I had a constant headache.

It was hell. I didn’t expect this going into surgery, no one had told me what to expect after. In a way I’m glad they didn’t because I wouldn’t have been so calm going into surgery if I had known what it would bring.

Or how long the pain would last…like forever!

I learned to walk, albeit with a walker. I could walk down the hall, past a fish tank and back to my room. When I could do that, and eat a cracker, they released me. They released me into my mothers care.

I spent nine days at my parents’ house with my mom by my side day and night. On day 18, post surgery I went home.

The next weeks and months were filled with frustrations, anguish and lots of tears. This wasn’t how I wanted my life to be. I felt like a cripple! I felt worse than when the tumor was there, and while I was glad it was gone, I was angry for what it had done to my body and what I was now faced with.

I pushed myself….hard! I had a little girl to take care of. I was quickly running out of leave time and we were almost completely out of money. I had a mortgage to pay and a job to do. So to prove myself I could do it. I went back to work.

The surgeon had told me I would be off work for 3-6 months. I went back to work part-time at 3 and a half WEEKS. I would go to work, get what I could finished, last as long as I could and then go home and crash for the evening. Looking back now I know with all my heart that if I hadn’t gone back to work so soon, if I hadn’t pushed myself so hard to get my life back to normal. I don’t’ think I ever would have.

I was also going to physical therapy at the time, I was back using my cane and trying so very hard to learn to walk without it. With the new limitations I had been dealt I was scared when I didn’t have that cane in my hand. My left foot was numb on the outside, so when I was walking I couldn’t feel when my foot hit the ground until I shifted my weight and the tissue and bones (which did have some feeling) told my brain I had reached the ground. So I tripped a lot, I misjudged surfaces all of the time and I fell….a LOT. It was humiliating and frustrating. When I did finally ditch the cane I walked really slow and stared at the ground constantly to make sure I didn’t misjudge. Because if I did misjudge and I stepped too hard, or I stumbled I would get these intense electrical shocks that traveled up my leg, up my back and to my brain.

And boy did they hurt.

Part 6 coming soon

(All of the pictures in this post were taken in the days and weeks after my surgery)

MY STORY (Part 4) DIAGNOSIS

2009-08-09T17:10:00.002-06:00

“The good news is that you don’t have MS.” He said.
“Not MS?” I replied.
“No” he said and then he paused.

I think he must have been thinking ‘how do I tell her this, on the phone, and how is she going to react.’ It couldn't have been an easy conversation for him to make…especially on the phone.

There are just some things you don’t do on the phone. Break up with someone, tell your girlfriend/ boyfriend you love them…for the first time, and give someone bad news.

This falls into the bad news department. By the way, I have broken up with someone on the phone so I guess getting this news by phone was my comeuppance. Do unto others…and all of that.

“You have a tumor.” He said

(I’m going to take a small trip down memory lane right now. You can call it a commercial break, because whenever I think of this conversation, my mind replays a scene from Kindergarten Cop, with Arnold Schwarzenegger, where he says to the little kid… “It’s not a tumor.”)

For me, it was a tumor. Now back to our regularly scheduled program.

The Neurologist said. “You have a very large tumor on your spinal cord. The tumor has compressed your spinal cord to a dangerous level. That is what is causing your leg problems. It needs to come out NOW. I have sent your MRI over to a neurosurgeon by the name of Dr. Bryson Smith; he is the best surgeon to perform this surgery. He may call you today, or this weekend, but be prepared to have surgery on Monday.”

I don’t remember what I said in response to his statement, his diagnosis. I also don’t remember calling my family to tell them, but I know I did call them, and I’m sure hearing the news over the phone wasn’t easy to them either.

What I do remember was feeling numb, but at peace. I had a diagnosis and they were gong to “fix it”. Or at least they were going to try. After I hung up the phone I grabbed my daughter really tight and cried. Part of the tears were happy, happy that I finally had a diagnosis…the other half were sad.

That weekend was a family campout. The doctor had told me I needed to wait to hear from the neurosurgeon so I stayed home waiting while my family took my daughter and went camping.

I spent the weekend thinking and praying…lots of praying.

But no one called.

On Monday morning Dr Bryson Smith’s office called and wanted to see me. My mom met me at his office where he examined me, had me do some of the same walking tests the other doctors had done and then showed me and my mom the MRI slides.

If you have never seen MRI pictures on disk before you should. It was amazing how clear they were and how really advanced MRI’s are. I have disks and disks of them now…including the one he showed us that day.

He scrolled down the MRI, starting at the top of the T-spine. As he scrolled he pointed out my lungs, each vertebrae, the spinal sack and the spinal cord. When he got to T-9 something white appeared and he stopped.

“There is the tumor” he said. He then pushed buttons that made the screen colors lighter so we could better see the white tumor.

He looked at us and went to the next vertebrae, and the next, and the next. As he did, each time he used the scroll of the mouse the tumor got bigger…and bigger. He stopped on T-11 and said. “And this” as he pointed to the screen, “is your spinal cord.”

I’m thinking….’where?’
I didn’t see it, honestly I didn’t. He had to back up a few slides and keep his finger on it for me to see it. The reason I didn’t see the spinal cord is because it barely existed. The tumor had smashed my spinal cord from its normally round shape, into a very thin crescent moon.

He told us it was a nerve sheath/ schwannoma spinal cord tumor. Schwannoma tumors develop from wacked out cells surrounding the nerves. He said mine went from T 9 to T 11 and that it was most likely not cancerous (later I would find out that only about 2% or schwannoma tumors are cancerous). He said these types of tumors take a long time to grow and that if he had to guess he would say mine had been growing for 5-7 years.

5-7 YEARS…Holy sh…er…crap!

5 years ago I had been pregnant and had those weird leg pains.
4 years ago I had picked my daughter up, or tried to, and experience that stabbing paralyzing pain.

It hit me like a train………..wham!!!

The tumor had caused those things. All along the tumor had been the reasons for so many weird medical things that had happened over the past 5 years. I had had 2 MRI’s in the past 5 years, not including the full body one, and they hadn’t shown anything because the tumor was 2 vertebrae above the range of those MRI’s

All I could think was…. Holy crap!

He told us that the tumor started on a nerve that runs along one of my ribs and that it grew into my spinal column and down the cord. He looked at the screen again, once again pointing to the crescent shape that was my spinal cord and said he couldn’t believe I was still walking.

I couldn’t believe it either, but the truth is…I really wouldn’t have been walking much longer.

He said that because the tumor had grown slowly it had allowed my body to adjust until it couldn’t adjust any further, but that he couldn’t believe I was still as mobile as I was.

My mind was racing with all of the information he was giving me. But I could pinpoint the time in all of this when my body decided it couldn’t adjust any more and the symptoms of the tumor became noticeable.

I could pinpoint it to the day.

It had been almost a year ago….October 2003 while I was walking around the side of my condo building. I stepped in a shallow hole that most people wouldn’t have even known about and most bodies wouldn’t have even tripped on and my body said ENOUGH…I can’t do this anymore. I just can’t adjust enough to this tumor inside you anymore. I can’t hold you up anymore with fewer nerves working. I just can’t.

And so down I went…literally and figuratively.

The Neurosurgeon said the tumor needed to come out. That surgery was the only way. But that we had caught it just in time. If we hadn’t caught it when we did I would soon become paralyzed and then eventually the blood flow would be compromised……and then….well….I needn’t say more.

However he was worried about how bad off the muscles were in my legs. He didn’t think my body was strong enough for surgery; he wanted me stronger so he prescribed me some steroids and schedule surgery for August 20th…that Friday. Four days away.

I had a training I was in charge of at work all week, and I hated that I had passed the first day off onto my unsuspecting coworkers who had no idea what they were doing. So I actually breathed a sigh of relief and went back to work.

Sometimes, usually when looking back on a situation, I wonder what the crap I was thinking. This is one I wonder about. I laugh about it now, but geez, who in their right mind would go back to work when they had four days to prepare for a life-changing surgery.

Apparently I do.

That week I took the pills, noticing some changes in my leg sensations. But mostly I spent the week on the Internet looking up information on spinal cord tumors and getting my personal papers in order.

This wasn’t just an everyday, ordinary surgery. I had been told the side effects by the surgeon. They included things such as: Paralyzation and death. Plus I had learned on the Internet that spinal cord tumors really aren’t that common. The statistics I read said something like 8,000 cases a year.

I also read many posts that said most Neurosurgeons don’t perform these types of surgeries. Most people go to Johns Hopkins or the Mayo Clinic.

My surgeon hadn’t done one before….I found that out later…thank goodness.

With those side effects I knew I needed to make sure my will was up to date and that all of my other important papers were in place and that my doctors had a copy of my living will.

Sounds morbid doesn’t it, well…it is.

Wednesday night I received a call from my regular doctor. I guess when I went in for the MRI on Friday, they had asked me if I wanted the results sent to anyone else and I had said “yes, send them to Dr. Johnson”. He got them that morning when he came into the office. He was floored by the results.

Weren’t we all?

He had called to apologize for not asking for an MRI of my whole spine. He couldn’t believe he had missed the tumor by two stinkin’ vertebrae. I could hear the guilt in his voice; I could hear that he felt he had failed me. I could almost feel the self-kicking he was giving himself.

I tried to let him know that I didn’t blame him. I said things like “you didn’t know” and “you weren’t the only doctor to miss it” and “I wasn’t having pain in my T-spine, so how could you know?”

He is a doctor, he plays God everyday. I guess he expects perfection from himself. He shouldn’t but he does. To this day I can still see the guilt in his eyes.

He wished me luck on that Wednesday night, told me I was in good hands with Dr. Smith and hung up.

I wanted to ask him if he thought I would survive the surgery. But there were just some things I didn’t dare ask my doctors…that question was at the top of my list.

I really don’t remember much else about that week before my surgery. I was mostly numb, maybe with shock…I don’t know. But that numbness kept the scared feelings away and allowed me to be a peace with my life. So much at peace that on my day of surgery I knew that if I was called home to my Father in Heaven, that if my life on earth was over, I would be okay. As would my daughter.

I had lived a good life. Not mistake free, because geez…I am who I am. But I had lived a good life. I didn’t have any unfinished business. If it was to happen, I was ready.

I didn’t want to die though. I had a 4 year old daughter that I wanted the opportunity to raise. I wanted to live, if only for her.

Always for her!

And so on August 20th 2004 I walked into the hospital at peace, but with a prayer in my heart, a very large prayer.

“Lord, let me live through this, let them remove this tumor from my body and make me whole so that I can be a mom.”

A mom…

I promised the Lord that if he would grant me this wish I would live my life devoted to being the best mom I could be.

A mom…that was all I wanted to be. That is what I wanted most out of life. Have you ever thought about what you would want most if you were to make a compromise with God while staring death in the face?

Neither had I.

My mom, my dad and my grandma were with me at the hospital. They helped get me dressed and ready for surgery, all the while they stayed pretty quiet and talked about mundane things.

I was worried most about my mom. I’ve never asked what went through her mind that day. I know she was scared. I knew because of the questions she had asked the neurosurgeon. I’m sure someday I will ask her what she thought, how she felt on that August day. I can’t imagine being in her shoes and faced with a similar situation.

My mom is my rock. She had been with me for the past year through test after test and little did I know at the time but I would ask so much more of her…so much more.

We were all expecting a 7-hour surgery. We had been told that they would go in through my back. Cut the muscles to get to the spinal column. They would try to remove the tumor, most likely having to remove other nerves and some bone. They would then use a “patch” made from cow cartilage….*moooo*…to seal the spinal sack and then sew me up.

(Sorry, even after 5 years I still can’t help myself. I have to ‘moo’ when I talk about my surgery.)

I’m part cow now. Thank you little cow.

If Dr Smith couldn’t get it all or he decided it was too much of a risk, he would get as much as he could, cauterize the rest and sew me up.

I said goodbye to my parents and grandma and they wheeled me into the operating room. I had already said my goodbyes to my daughter. The night before the two of us had slept curled together all night longh

I know it may sound funny. But as they rolled me into the operating room I laughed.

I was thinking. “Those poor doctors.” hahaha
“Here I am lying on my back. They are going to have to lift me and flip me like a pancake before they can operate on me.”
I’m no lightweight, those poor doctors. hehehe

I just hoped they didn’t drop me.

The anesthesiologist came into the operating room and told me he would be with me throughout the whole surgery. He told me he was going to ask me to count backwards from 100 to 1 as he gave me the anesthetic, but before he did that, did I have any questions?
I lifted my head, looking over my toes and saw all of the nurses and doctors running every which way in the room. They were bringing in carts and trays filled with medical stuff. They were doing their jobs, getting ready to cut me open. (That isn’t a thought you want to dwell on for very long) It was cold in the room, but not uncomfortably so. I looked back up at the anesthesiologist, who was older than me by about 20 years or so and asked two questions.

Part 5 coming soon.

FAMILY FUN

2009-08-08T18:41:00.005-06:00

Our family went on a picnic to Farmington pond today. We wanted to go to Willard Bay but it was so very cold this morning. So we went to the pond. It was a great time with the family.

First us women and the kids went on a nature hike.

Then did some fishing.

And then sat around the picnic table, ate and gabbed about nothing in particular.

This cute little girl came today. It is my new niece and she is so very very cute.

The kids had fun, as did us parents. It was a very relaxing way to spend a Saturday.

MY STORY (Part 3) TESTS, TESTS, TESTS

2009-08-07T12:12:00.002-06:00

What did that EMG show? What did that little needle tell the machine?

My muscle wasn’t working. One muscle on one leg. That was it, that was all.

It wasn’t anything I didn’t already know. But I’ll never understand why it didn’t show more loss of muscle than that, because really, more than one wasn’t working.

I’m just glad it showed something.

However, it proved something that I already knew. For some reason the muscles in my legs were quickly shutting down. What had started with the ankle muscles on my right leg had turned into almost complete loss of sensation on the outside (skin) of my left leg and almost no feeling in my left foot. Then there were the stabbing and tingling sensations in both legs and the use of a cane. But even that cane was starting not to hold me up...my legs were quickly getting worse.

My general practitioner (Dr Johnson) sent me on to a Neurologist for further testing…still thinking I had MS.

In the car on the way to see the neurologist I was actually thinking it was time to buy a walker.

A walker at age 30! That is how bad it was.

My neurologist. A man by the name of Dr Sidiq met with me and my mom in August 2004. He had me perform some of the same walking and muscle tests my regular doctor had done, he looked at the results of the EMG test and then he too told me that I more than likely had MS.

That diagnosis scared me, because there really isn’t a cure and lets be honest here…I was 30 and didn’t like the prospect of continuing on the downward spiral until I was unable to walk and worse. I had many more years to live and really didn’t want to spend them being dependent upon my mom, who has Lupus and my daughter. I’m an independent sort…almost too independent.

He said to confirm his suspicions he was scheduling me for an MRI of my brain. But that he also wanted a full body MRI, not just the brain. I’m not sure of his reasons, I’m not even sure he HAD a reason, but It was that decision and that decision alone that I will be forever grateful for. Without that decision my spiral would have quickly continued downward towards being paralyzed and even death.

On Friday August 13th 2004 I found myself lying in a large metal tube with a horrible helmet thing holding my head still for over 2 hours while they performed four MRI’s. MRI’s of the Brain, C-spine, T-spine and L-spine.

I remember leaving the hospital exhausted, nauseated and tired. I called my sister, or was it my mom, to complain about how awful having an MRI of your whole body was and that I would never EVER do that again (little did I know, oh how little I knew that day).

I went to work after that test and then continued on with my day trying my hardest to forget the awful morning and being stuck inside a tube that is really way too small of a place to spend more than 5 minutes, let alone 2 hours in.

That night I left work, picked up my daughter, stopped someplace and then headed home. The answering machine light was blinking and the screen showed 3 messages, all three were from the neurologist. The third message said basically. It is urgent that you call me ASAP. I am leaving work, call my home at ###-####.

My heart started beating way too fast. They had found something- that was all I could think. They had found something and it was bad.

Really bad!

I called him back right away and tried my best to prepare myself for the news.

He answered the phone and proceeded to tell me that the radiologist had called him during the MRI because there was something serious on the scan. He and another doctor at the hospital had looked over the MRI pictures and that he had a diagnosis for me.

And it wasn’t’ MS.

Part 4 coming soon.

THE FAIR

2009-08-06T18:29:00.010-06:00

We went to the fair last night. I've been taking Emmi to the fair since she was a little tike. Some years it is great, others I could do without. But my daughter keeps begging every year to go. She loves all of the animals. That is the real reason.

The past two years we have invited along a friend. This cute little brown haired munchkin is this years pick. I so need to birth a child with brown hair like this.

The girls rode a ride....

"Hi girls, look at the crazy woman taking pictures."

We saw a beautiful rainbow.

Then we went to the Rodeo. *sigh* Yeees,I know, we just went to a Rodeo, but we liked it so much we decided to try again. Plus I forgot to take my camera to the one a few weeks ago.

At the Rodeo you see lots of these...

and these...

Oh and best of all, lots of these...

This one had me doing major sighs..I hope he doesn't read this blog someday...Oh wait, no one reads this blog so I'm safe.

*sigh* Oh Wow! Double wow.

I think my parents say a prayer every night that I don't marry a cowboy.

They have been saying this same prayer for 20 years.

"One day mom and dad, one day I will find one who will rope me in and... "

Enough of my dream, now back to the Rodeo

*tap tap tap, is this thing on" "Anyone there?"

Okay so now for our Rodeo story...and my daughter would KILL me if she knew I put this story up for you to read.

Okay, Emmi picked REALLY good seats (according to her) at the Rodeo. So she chose some really close ones. They were second row and right next to the bull pins.......right next to them. She wanted to see all of the bulls and horses and cowboys. She is my daughter afterall.

So there we are, watching the bull riding and enjoying ourselves when the bull next to us is up for his turn. I guess as they opened the gates the bull decided to relieve himself. He started bucking at the same time and flung bull-sh*! (sorry mom, but that is what it is called) all over the three of us.

I busted a gut laughing and couldn't stop. Emmi is screaming 'get it off me, get it off, Mooooom, get it off me." And I couldn't because I was laughing so hard that tears were pouring down my face.

Oh man it was just too funny.

But the story doesn't end there Towards the middle of the rodeo Emmi turns to me and says."Mom, there is a naked cowboy over there."

Not something you hear every day, and I'm a sucker for cowboys...even clothed ones...so I turn my head and ...there really WAS a naked cowboy about 40 feet from my daughters little eyes. The guy I guess thought no one could see him strip down behind the bull pins...and we, umm, could. So there I am with two 9 year staring at a cowboy who is naked except for a long-ish button down shirt.

I, of course, told them not to watch, but really...they had already seen everything there was to see.

So did you know that some cowboys go commando under their jeans and chaps?....

Neither did I.

What a night

MY STORY (Part 2) DOWNHILL

2009-08-04T08:45:00.002-06:00

There is no man in our home, therefore there is no one to pass off all of those I-don’t-want-to-do-it jobs. Come on women, you know you do it. You pass things to your husband that you are capable of doing but just don’t want to. Like killing bugs, unstopping the tub and…well…painting the walls. That is what I was doing on this day in June 2004.

I was painting the dining room walls in my condo and while doing so I stood on a kitchen chair to reach something. As I was up there a screwdriver must have rolled off of the table and onto the carpet, because as I was stepping off of the chair, I stepped right onto the screwdriver…which rolled under my foot… and I fell sideways onto the floor.

I lay there for a while. I wasn’t really hurt, although it did reinjure my right ankle, but I hadn’t hurt myself However I HAD grabbed onto the table on my way down, thus spilling green paint everywhere. So I got up, cleaned the paint off of the carpet and chair as best I could and decided to go shower the paint off of myself.

As I was standing in the shower both my right and left legs started to tingle more than usual, then the tingling turned into a stabbing pain and then nothing…they went numb… almost completely numb….from the knee down. As they went numb, I had slowly sunk to the bottom of the tub. I don’t remember if my back was hurting at the time, I just remember having the hardest time getting out of the tub, dragging myself to the dryer, which thankfully was in the bathroom, and getting dressed. I then drug myself down the hall and called 911.

I was a little embarrassed when the paramedics and fire engines showed up at the house. I was crying, scared and didn’t really know what to tell the paramedics other than that I had fallen and couldn’t get up. (hahahaha that is a good one.)

Anywho, they put me on a gurney and carried me down the stairs and into the ambulance.

My daughter, who was taking a nap at the time I called 911, had to stay with the fire department until my sister could rush up to my house. She got there just as they were loading me into the ambulance. After dropping my little one off with her husband she rushed up to the hospital to be with me.

The ER doctor didn’t really do much. In fact going to the ER was really a waste of time and money. He didn’t want to perform another MRI because I had just had one. So he did a lot of poking, prodding and I did a lot of waiting. And as time went on, slowly the feeling started coming back into my legs. At some point he released me and my sister took me home. I was scared, so very scared.

This incident made me fearful of going anywhere. I didn’t know if my legs would do that again and I didn’t want it to happen again. So I stayed in the house, reading books, watching TV and playing with my daughter.

Other than work I had made myself a prisoner in my own home.

The feeling never really came back into my legs completely after coming home from the hospital. I could walk, but my balance was awful and as each day wore on it got worse. I stopped lifting and carrying my daughter in fear that I would drop her and I started wearing shoes that were flat on the ground. No more heals for me.

In late June, while at a park with my family, my four year old daughter ran away form me.

Kids that age are always running, and it is usually AWAY from you.

I went to run after her as I had done since the day she learned to walk. However, while my mind told my legs to run…. They didn’t. I was stunned. I tried to run again and once again my legs moved at a slow walking pace. I couldn’t run anymore, it was the weirdest thing and it terrified me. I had a four year old who played outside and had one mode…fast. What would I do if she ran into the street or put herself into a dangerous situation?

As a mother, that made my heart jump. As a result I started keeping her inside and not allowing her to play out in the yard. I forced her to hold my hand everywhere we went. She hated that, boy did she hate that.

I was loosing the use of my legs, going paralyzed. I needed to accept that and come to terms with what was happening. I didn’t’ know why, but I knew what the end result would be. So in early July while at work I drove to a medical supply store and purchased a fold up cane. That night I went home, grabbed my daughter close to my heart and cried for hours

I went to see my doctor a few days later and with a lot of crying and well, sobbing really…. I told him I needed his help. I needed to know what was wrong with me. I wanted a name attached to what was happening to me. I wanted to know because I was hoping there was something I could do to stop it, or better yet…reverse it. I wanted my life back.

I have to tell you, I love my doctor. He is on the top of my list of people I admire. He is the type of doctor that if he doesn’t know the answer he will tell you he doesn’t know, he will then hunt down until he does know. He listens to you…he really does. And because he really listened to me and didn’t brush off what I said, he started the ball rolling that would lead to a diagnosis. While he feels guilt about how long that diagnosis took and that he didn’t do *blah blah blah* early enough, he doesn’t need to. Sometimes diagnosing someone is a crapshoot and a guessing game, especially when it comes to conditions doctors just don’t see. And he had never seen a case like mine. Even though he didn’t diagnoses me early enough to suite his conscience, he listened to me. He called for more tests and his actions led to my diagnosis.

I sat in his office that day, tears pouring down my cheeks while he performed test after test……and saw something that worried him. My feet didn’t seem to be equal when performing visual tests on the muscles. My left leg seemed weaker and I didn’t seem to be able to hold my left foot up. He listed off reasons for this but told me straight forward that because of how quickly this had all hit he suspected MS. He came right out and told me he had never seen anything like this before, but I think he was as scared as I was at how drastically downhill I was going. But before any more test were done he wanted to confirm what he saw visually. So he made an appointment for me with a doctor who could perform an EMG (Electromyography) test. This test is used to check the muscles and the nerves that control the muscles. This is done by inserting very thin needles with electrodes through your skin and into each muscle. The electrodes tell the machine whether the muscles and nerves are working properly.

I like to think of it as acupuncture with a purpose. They stuck something like 30 needles into each leg and expected me to like it.

Guess what…. I didn’t!

Who in their right mind would pay to have someone do that to you…not me, oh wait I guess I did pay for them to do that. Nevermind.

It was one of those needles. One stinkin’ tiny needle that was inserted into the bottom front of my left leg that showed something. And this something would be enough for Dr. Johnson to send me to a neurologist. And this neurologist would be the one to prescribe the test that would change my life forever.

Part 3 coming soon

CHARITY'S LASAGNA

2009-08-03T19:03:00.008-06:00

It has been a while since our last recipe on here. I've been busy trying other peoples recipies on a new website.

I list this recipe for my little sister, who has been begging me for ...like...2 and a half years to "write it down" next time I cook it.

I'm horrible about writing my recipies down. I just make them, I don't really HAVE a recipe. but I measured the ingredients this time...just for you little sister.

And it HAS only been 2 and a half years...not four.

pbttttthhhhhhh

Charity's Lasagna
6 Lasagna Noodles
1 26 oz can or bottle Spaghetti Sauce (I use Hunts Traditional)

1 Lb Ground Beef
¼ Onion Chopped
1 T Parsley
¾ C Zucchini (chopped into small triangles)
½ C Corn
½ C Yellow Squash (chopped into small triangles)
½ C Carrots (chopped)
½ tsp Garlic Powder
1 tsp Red Wine Vinegar
1 T Brown Sugar
1 T Flour
1 ½ C Mozzarella Cheese (grated)
1 ½ C Cottage Cheese
1 Egg
Salt
Pepper

Preheat oven to 350 degrees

Boil Lasagna noodles according to package directions.

In a small bowl stir together cottage cheese and egg. Set aside for later.

While noodles are cooking. In a deep skillet, on medium heat, combine raw ground beef, carrots, onion and parsley. Add Salt and Pepper to meat. Cook until meat is brown.

When meat is cooked add zucchini, corn, and yellow squash. Cook for 3 minutes stirring constantly.

Add Spaghetti sauce and stir.

To spaghetti sauce mixture add: Garlic powder, red wine vinegar, and brown sugar. Stir well.

Slowly add in flour. Stir well. Cook for 5 minutes.

Drain noodles and then layer in a greased 9x11 glass casserole dish as follows:

Lay three noodles on the bottom of the casserole dish, then use half of the spaghetti mixture and spoon over the noodles. Add half of the cottage cheese and then sprinkle with ½ cup of mozzarella cheese. Repeat again topping with the remaining cup of mozzarella cheese.

Bake for 40 minutes.

MY STORY (Part 1) THE BEGINNING

2009-08-01T12:23:00.005-06:00

As I approach August 20th this year, I do it with mixed emotions. August 20th is an anniversary of sorts for me. It is the day my personal hell ended and the fight of my life began. It is the day I learned what real strength was and the day I learned that you really can be at peace when faced with the possibility of death.

But it was the day after when I learned that if you want something bad enough, you have to fight for it. And sometimes you don’t always win. It was the day after when I began to lean who I really was and just how much strength I had inside.

But to get to that day 5 years ago, I must tell you a story. I tell this story in the hopes that somewhere, someone will gain strength from reading this.

We all struggle in life and each of our struggles are different. If there is one thing I have learned on this journey…it is:

Laugh!

Laugh as often as you can and as hard as you can.

Laugh at yourself, Laugh at life, Laugh through your tears.

Just Laugh

And THIS is my story.

My story begins almost a decade ago, in January 2000 while I was pregnant with my daughter. At the time I was 25, single, and five months into the pregnancy. I looked like a giant marshmallow and pretty much felt like one too.

It had not been an easy pregnancy. I had pretty much survived on Apples and Hotdogs (and I hate hotdogs, so what does that tell you?). I was one of those pregnant women who never glowed…I looked green. It was awful.

So when I started to have sharp numbing pains that ran down both my legs I just chalked it up to one more thing on the long list of hellish things that pregnancy did to me. My doctor told me that sometimes babies position themselves in such a way that it can cause sciatic nerve pains. But by month eight, my pains were so intense and the sensations so weird that my doctor was scratching his head. I did the only thing I could. I laughed it off and dealt with it. But by week 38 of my pregnancy I could barely walk without crying with every step. I couldn’t wait to get her out.

After my daughter was born the leg pains disappeared and life went on. Until one summer day in July (I think) of 2001 when I bent over to pick up my one year old daughter and experienced the sharpest pain of my life that traveled from my lower back down both legs and sent me collapsing to the ground in pain. My doctor at the time (the LAST woman doctor I will ever have) sent me in for an MRI of the L-spine, telling me that it was probably a pinched nerve. The MRI came back showing no pinched nerve and I was told that I had arthritis in my spine that may have caused the pain. I would later learn that EVERYONE has arthritis in their spine and that it really wasn’t a good diagnosis).

Life continued with no problems or issues for several years. But then in October of 2003, the rollercoaster ride took a dangerous turn that started a downward spiral that I never thought would end.

On that October evening while checking on a small garden behind our condo building, I stepped into a small sink hole and twisted my right ankle. It sounds like a small thing, and in normal peoples lives it would have been a small thing, but for me it was the one defining moment in time that marks the start of the toughest battle I have had to fight in all my life.

The instacare doctor gave me one of those air cushioned foot braces for my ankle and sent me on my way. He told me to give it a few weeks and by then it should be healed, but if it wasn’t I needed to go see my general doctor.

I’ve heard those words before “If it gets worse, or isn’t better…” I just never thought I would have to use that advise. But a few weeks later the ankle wasn’t healed and I had to go see my general practitioner, a new doctor by the name of Dr. Johnson, and a few weeks after that I twisted it again and the darn ankle just wouldn’t get better, in fact I started to notice that the toes on my right foot were also starting to tingle.

It was a weird sensation. One that closely resembles the tingling sensation you get when your foot falls asleep and you are trying to wake it up. The tingles made it difficult to walk but I just laughed it off. (Next time your leg goes to sleep, try and stand on it and walk. That is my world….weird huh?)

Then one day in about February of 2004 as I was walking up the steps to my condo my left knee gave out on me. It just gave out, no warning, no pain, no nothing. I was walking one minute and the next I was flat on my face and my daughter was freaking out. So now my right ankle was loosing strength, my right toes were tingly and my left knee had just given out on me.

I ignored the knee and tried to go on with life. However, sometime in spring of that year, maybe April the tingling in my right foot turned to numbness in my right foot and the toes on my left foot started to tingle too. It was spreading slowly up my legs and my lower back was bothering me.

I made an appointment with my doctor again who then decided to perform an MRI on my L-spine to see if there was a pinched nerve. He mentioned that I had been diagnosed with “chronic back pain” a few years ago…which floored me… since when does one episode of back pain give you a “chronic” diagnosis. I told him about the incident with lifting my daughter and the last MRI I had received. He looked it up in the system (In Utah, IHC keeps everything in a centralized system so my doc was able to see what had happened even though he wasn’t my doctor at the time….I love it ) and then sent me for the MRI.

Anyway the second MRI was done and it showed that there had been no change since the last one except for something to do with a disk. (I honestly can’t remember what it was).

That was around May or June of 2004. Up until then I was concerned, but not overly so. I didn’t know what was happening but I guess I just hoped that one day it would all go away. But that didn’t happen. What happened next scared me so bad. It was this one incident that made me realize there was something wrong with me. Something that no amount of time waiting around, was going to heal.

Part 2 Coming soon!

PESTER, POKE, GIGGLE

2009-07-28T15:17:00.003-06:00

One of the greatest joys of being a mother is being able to irritate, pester if you will, my child.

It is sick I know, but it is me.

I’m good at pestering.

Really good!

Just ask my mom, or my dad, or my siblings or…well…anyone who knows me.

But most of all… ask my nine year old.

This is her life, the one she has been dealt, the one she must endure, all because she was born of my loins.

Her: That smells good mom, what is that smell?
Me: Dinner
Her: What is for dinner?
Me: Food
Her: Moooom, what kind of food.
Me: Well, some meat, some veggies, some type of fruit. Ya know,(pause) food.
Her: Mooooooooom would you just tell me what you are cooking.
Me: Dinner
Her Moooooooooooooom, geez

It is the “mooooooooom” reaction that I am waiting for. I love it, I thrive on it. It is what gives me the giggles and makes my world a happy place.

I just love to pester her, but ya know, she loves it too. It is part of our relationship, it is part of US.

She climbs in bed on Saturday mornings just waiting for me to wake up and pester her….no kidding….she does.

She waits for me to make spiders or bees out of my hands and attack her while she tries to “kill” my spider or “swat” my bee. She will giggle and wiggle and swat away while I tickle and giggle and make my world a happy place.

There are times though when my pestering evokes eye rolls from her, but even those times are fun for her too….well, at least I tell myself that.

Like when she has on a polka dot shirt and I just can’t help myself.

Really I can’t… and I know you see this one coming from a mile away….but I have to poke……every single stinking DOT on her clothes.

“moooooooooooom” she says as she wiggles away…”stop mom…mom geez, stop.” Then she giggles and pokes me back… and my world is a happy place.

Or when I sing at the top of my lungs and start dancing in the kitchen to her ipod songs while her friends are watching.
“Moooooooom, geez you are weird.” *eye roll*

Her friends tell her she has a cool mom, she tells them she has a weird mom. She will say “She even dances in the stores.” Her friends tell her they wish their moms danced and sang and giggled with them like her mom does.

And she says “Yeah, but she is sooooo weird.”

Which is true…I pretty much act weird everywhere.

Because, well, I pretty much AM weird.

And I love it.

RODEO

2009-07-24T16:39:00.008-06:00

Last night we went to the Rodeo. It has been something like 15 years since I have been to a Rodeo and Emmi has never been.

We saw lots of this...

I was kind of shocked that I would like the bull riding because I remembered not liking it at the last rodeo. But this was my favorite part of the rodeo.

And some of this... lots of this...lots of roping

and the little kids doing the mutton busting had me laughing.

Emmi and I had a blast at the Rodeo. And the cowboys weren't bad to stare at either.

Yeeeehaaaw

CHOCOLATE PEANUT BUTTER PIE

2009-07-19T18:17:00.004-06:00

Another family favoite for you today. This is my BIL's favorite pie and he begs for it all the time. I'm giving it to you today.

And it is so very easy and fast to make.

CHOCOLATE PEANUT BUTTER PIE
1 Grahm Cracker Crust ( or you can make your own by smashing graham crackers and mixing with butter)
1/2 Cup Peanut Butter- Creamy
4 oz container of Whipped Cream Chease
2/3 Cup Powdered Sugar
4 Tbsp Milk
1.5 oz Chocolate Pudding mix
1 3/4 Cup Milk (for pudding mix)

In a bowl, combine Peanut Butter, Cream Chease, Powdered Sugar and the 4 T of Milk.

After mixing, place in the bottom of the crust.

Mix Chocolate Pudding with 1 3/4 C Milk. Stir well so that no lumps remain. Wait a minute until the pudding starts to thicken then pour over the peanut butter in the pie crust.

Refrigerate for at least 30 minutes.

Top with Cool Whip and serve.

NEW ROOM

2009-07-12T15:00:00.007-06:00

Does anyone remember these pictures?

pretty bad huh? Back in the fall I painted the walls a creamy yellow and got rid of the gold stripes and the gold baseboards.

I also ran out of money so I couldn't finish the room. OOps

So this past month I have been working on finishing the room. I was determined to have the room be a green, yellow, and dark red color scheme... well it didn't work out quite that way. No matter what I looked at in those colors I just didn't like it. I struggled for weeks and weeks about those colors.

Finally I decided to find curtains that I liked and work from that.

Emmi chose these dark brown panels with polka dots of brown, yellow, green, and blue.

I have always hated the color blue in a home.

Blue/grey....fine... but Blue....NO no no!

So at the time I told her I didn't like them and we kept looking...only to come back weeks later and buy those panels.

So then I looked at pillows to match those curtains and found the beautiful things on my couch. I paid an arm for them, but I fell in love. After those pillows the room just seemed to fall into place.

I'm mostly done, except the cubby with my computer. That will take a bit longer to do because I need to buy a new desk and shelving and such. But I am so very happy with what we have done so far.

OLD MEMORIES

2009-07-05T20:22:00.004-06:00

Remember the days of the old photo booths? My friends and I LOVED those things. It was almost as if we went to K-Mart just for those booths. Because why else would you go to K-mart (sorry Martha Stewart).

Emmi and I were walking in the mall this weekend having a little mommy and me time and happened upon a photo booth. AND GUESS WHAT? You actually got to choose between Black and White, Color or Sepia. And the other freaking cool thing was that it gave you two sets of matching pictures, so no more arguing over who got what picture. (man did me and my friends argue).

So I couldn't help myself, we had to take two sets of pictures. One in Color and one in Sepia.

It was a great trip down memory lane. I'm going to have to search for my old pictures from my teenage years now.

SAN FRANCISCO

2009-06-26T20:40:00.004-06:00

I spent the last week in San Francisco. It wasn't really a vacation. I'm not allowed to take those...It was for work...only work....

Okay, so I played a bit too.

My boss went with me, so I wouldn't get mugged...ummm, I mean to learn about all of the new rules.

I think it really was so I wouldn't get mugged.

Or maybe he wanted a NON-vacation too.

Who knows, well, he does I suppose.

Anywho, our vacation... I mean business trip started out on a funny note. While we were in the airport terminal in SLC we heard this guy start yelling at the top of his lungs. Turned out it was the pilot of our plane. Here is pretty much what he said;

"I am your pilot for this trip, but I'm also ex navy. This flight is completely full so I expect each of you to line up in an orderly manor and board my plane as quickly as possible. Anyone who does not do so will be tackled by my crew, harassed a bit, and then escorted from my plane.

The isle on this plane belongs to ME.... I will repeat that. The isle belongs to ME! So get in, store your shit, and get your butt in your seat. If I see anyone loitering in MY isle, I will ask my crew to tackle them, harass them a bit and escort them from my plane.

For those of you who think you can "take my crew on" Let me introduce you to them. This is _____ He is ex military and _______ he did a stint at a security guard. Any questions? Nope!Welcome to United Flight ______________"

He then boarded the plane. It took all of us a little bit but then we all started laughing. The funniest part was that it worked. It was the easiest plane boarding I've ever seen and we were even able to take off early. The pilot stood at the front of the plane and anytime the isle would stop moving he would yell. "Who's congesting MY isle?" LOL One guy actually apologised.

We need more pilots like him.

--------
The conference in San Fran was wonderful. We had lots of dignitaries and celebs there to help kick off National Service, and while I hated all of the security measures and the secret service check, at least it kept the homeless beggars away from the convention center.

It didn't, however, keep them away from everywhere else.

The downside of San Fran, is that every-freaking-where-you-go you are harassed by beggars.

Beggars wanting money,

Beggars wanting to sell you newspaper (of which are probably free at the local Walgreens)

Beggars who use their kids to beg for them.

Beggars playing Home Depot buckets.... actually those were entertaining. The guys were really REALLY good at playing those Home Depot drums.

I think Home Depot should drop some money in their cups for the free marketing.

I'm just saying!

The fun parts of the trip were... Eating at Neptune's on Fisherman's Wharf, seeing all of the Sea Lions on Pier 39, Riding in a Trolley, Walking those thigh burning hills in China Town, Eating more garlic than can kill a small child at the "Stinking Rose " in Little Italy, and seeing the Golden Gate Bridge and Alcatraz from Fort Mason.

Garlic ice cream really shouldn't be listed in the good parts, although it wasn't as awful as it sounded.

The best part of all, other than Jon Bon Jovi and Mathew Mcconaughey, was the buildings.

BIG, BEAUTIFUL OLD BUILDINGS!

Overall, it was a wonderful trip.

I'm very tired, and very glad I'm home...as is my little one.

IT FOLLOWS ME EVERYWHERE

2009-06-17T20:51:00.002-06:00

Weird people always seem to show up in my life.

There was the guy who was persistent in wanting to date me. He held on for YEARS!

Then there was the high achiever who was in his late thirties and working at Bird World.

The guy I met on the Internet back in 2004 who flew out to Utah to 'see some friends" and meet me, and then didn't have enough room on his visa to rent a car, so he wanted me to drive down to SLC to pick him up then he became angry because I hadn't been cleared to drive at night (this was a few weeks after my surgery)

Incidental, he got married a few months later to another girl he met while he was down here. I guess she had no problem with his credit issues and his weirdness.

And the hospital laundry dude, and well.... you get the point

Anyway, that brings me to today.

I stopped at 7-11 to get gas on the way to work and while I'm pumping my gas I hear.

"Are you heading to work?"

I looked around and at the next pump over was a guy filling up his astro van. Being the kind person I am I said "yup" then turned around hoping that THAT would be the end.

But nooooooooooooooooooo, not with my luck.

"So where do you work?"

Like I'm going to reveal that info. I just said the city I work in and turned back around.

He continued. "What do you do for work?"

I have to jump in here and say two things. By now this conversation was getting irritating. First because English was NOT this guys first language and I kept having to say WHAT? and second because if I'm not willing to tell you where I work, why would I be willing to tell you what I do for work.

So I lied!

Forgive me Lord, but there are times when a single woman must do that, and this was one of those times.

But it didn't end there, it just got weirder.

"Do you have many friends?"

I rolled my eyes here, ya see I work in a building with people who have mental health issues. I don't work WITH those people, but they wander the halls, and get lost and sometimes we have to direct them back to the floor where their services are. This guy probably frequents my building, or at least he should.

I was a little weirded out. But more than that, I was thinking...

WHY CAN'T A NICE GUY TRY TO PROPOSITION ME OR TRY TO PICK ME UP. Why does it have to be weird ones.

I did reply back to him by saying that I have lots of friend, to which he replied...

"Do you want to be my friend?"

What the crap??? Who, other than kindergartners asks a question like that? NO NO NO I don't want to be your friend. You probably have all of the other "friends" you picked up at 7-11 stores bound, gagged and stashed in your Astro Van. And I'm a party pooper and don't want to join them.

When he asked for my phone number I told him it was unlisted.

What a way to start the morning!

MY SWEET SIXTEEN APPLE TREE

2009-06-01T17:23:00.001-06:00

Two years ago (spring 2007) I set out to find an apple tree for my yard. I had some parameters to guide my decision but what I really wanted was a Fuji Apple tree.
When I couldn't find a short Fuji, I started looking for other apple trees.

I wanted an apple that I could eat, but that was firm enough to bottle into apple pie filling. The tree also had to be short. (I have a fear of tall trees...really I do) So I wanted a tree that didn't grow over 15-20 ft high.

I also wanted a short tree because I have to pick the dag-nabbid things and don't want to regret my tree decision in 10 years when I need to hire someone to climb it and pick it.

While I was out searching for trees I came across a Sweet Sixteen Apple. It was a hybrid between something and something else and was designed up in Minnesota for the cold temps. It was a shorter apple tree and could be canned. So I bought it.

After I had planted the tree I decided to do some research on it.

I know, I really didn't think that one out...did I?

There were a lot of sites on the apple tree but there were some that concerned me. People said it took many many years before the tree produced, some saying that it never did. That really worried me. Then there was my dad, who told me I had picked a tree that would never grow apples. That didn't help!

I decided that if the tree didn't produce in 3 years that I would just buy another apple tree and plant it next to the Sweet Sixteen.

Last year it bloomed...like 8 blooms... but it bloomed none the less. I started to get really excited, hoping for apples. But the blooms fell off and I cried...then I went on with life.

This past spring I started wondering if there were any pollinating trees in the area, so I searched out and not seeing any other apple or crabapple trees I decided to buy another apple tree. I bought a Fuji. (hahaha)

But then the Sweet Sixteen busted out in these beautiful white flowers. Since my Fuji had just been planted and wasn't blooming, I again began to worry that I wouldn't get apples.

But low and behold, a neighbor a few houses over has an apple tree, and because of that I got these cute little green and red devils hanging on my tree.

I couldn't be prouder.
And I can't wait to eat them!

IT IS A TIE GAME

2009-06-01T11:17:00.003-06:00

Motherhood sure seems like a game sometimes.

Why is it that summer hits, and there is no more school, and yet my daughter has to find something to whine about?

This past Friday it was that school was over and... (in a high pitched whine) "I won't see my friends aaaaall summer long, cause I can't stay home, cause you have to work."

Then there was the "no sleepover" whine. This one is a good one! If your children haven't ever whined about not getting a sleepover...you should start telling them "no" just to experience this particular whine. It can go on for hours and hours.

All yesterday it was the "I'm not a baby" whine. You see, last summer my daughter decided she hated going to the babysitters house. She has been going there for 3 years now and doesn't like it. There are really no kids her age there, so I understand. But she isn't a baby, so she didn't want to go the the babysitters this summer.

Instead we decided to send her to a youth center. Where there will be kids of all ages, games, reading time, outings....FUN RIGHT????

Well, you probably see what is coming...a whine...

"But I don't KNOW anyone there."

Ummmm HELP ME, I'm loosing here!

But this week the center isn't opened, so she has to go do the babysitters. So this morning as we are driving over there she says.

"All I'm going to do is change baby diapers and have to hold crying babies all day long. What do you think of that."

My response was. "Well, there is nothing like learning about real life. All I did for 3 years was change baby diapers and listen to you cry. Now I just get to listen to you whine."

I got a pout, an eye roll, and a sigh.

I've decided that once you become a mom you never win anymore. It is nice to just have a tie game.

9.6

2009-05-26T12:00:00.003-06:00

Just a quick update...more like down-date...well, never mind.

I'm down by 9.6 lbs as of the morning. Wish I could say 10, but I'm not quite down that far. The calorie counter website has helped me stay on track and know what I really am taking into my body. If you haven't ever tried a calorie counter website try one.

There is also a cool feature on the website I use, where it tells you how many calories you should be consuming. It sure beats having to calculate it myself...which is what we were taught in my college classes.
http://caloriecount.about.com/

Like I said, try it out.

There is also a cool website to figure out the calorie intake for your kids.
http://www.bcm.edu/cnrc/?PMID=0

Good luck!

I LOVE SPRING

2009-05-16T16:13:00.007-06:00

This is my favorite time of the year. Emmi and I have spent the last month or so (when it wasn't pouring down rain) getting the yard all spruced up. This year hasn't been as bad as years past. Every year there are less weeds to worry about.

One day there won't be any.

I wish!

So today we got the rest of our garden planted. We have added things this year that we haven't planted before (or for a long time) and it seems we have lots of food out there.

We have: Baby Carrots, Peas, Green Onions, Zucchini, Crookneck Squash, Head Lettuce, Leaf Lettuce, Pumpkins, Baby Pumpkins, Cantaloupe, Watermelon, and Tomatoes...Oh and strawberries and Blackberries and Apples and Peaches.

Not all of those last few are in the garden.

So here is the garden.

Oh and LOOK, my neighbor mowed his lawn (another story for another day)

Here are Emmi's Head Lettuce. The lady at the nursery told Emmi that the bugs stay away if you plant marigolds and basil by them. I think she just wanted us to buy more plants. I also think these will die a slow and painful death.

And here is the Cantaloupe. I will be surprised if these last a week. More than likely I will be buying some from the nursery in a few days. These were planted from seed in our house.

And the strawberries that will become a nice meal for the birds in a month or so.

I really don't expect to eat one. How sad is that?

This is my pride and joy (after my child). This is my "snoopy garden". It got that name because it looks like the silhouette of snoopy. I loooooooooove my decorative gardens!

I'll post pictures of it as the summer progresses and other things start blooming.

Happy Spring.

HONEY MUSTARD NUT CRUSTED SALMON

2009-05-12T19:04:00.005-06:00

I know it has been a little while since our last menu item, but with birthdays and Mother's day I didn't get a chance to select the item I wanted to share with you.

Tonight I cooked a variation of my second favorite meal item SALMON. (Manicotti being my most favorite)

This recipe even impressed my daughter, who groaned long and hard when she was told we were having salmon for dinner. She ate almost the whole thing.

It makes a mama proud.

So here it is for you to share with your family.

------------------------------------------------

Honey Mustard Nut Crusted Salmon
Serves 4
About 470 Calories per serving

4 (4 oz) Salmon fillets
¼ Cup Butter- melted
3 T Mustard
2 T Honey
¼ C Breadcrumbs
1/8 C Smashed Walnuts
1/8 C Smashed Pecans (or you can use ¼ C of just one type of nut)
1 T Parsley- chopped
Pepper
Salt
Lemon Juice or fresh lemons to taste

Preheat oven to 400 degrees
Combine butter, mustard and honey together in a small bowl
In a separate bowl combine breadcrumbs, walnuts, pecans, parsley, salt and pepper.

Place Salmon in a greased pan (or a pan lined with aluminum foil)
Brush butter mixture on each salmon fillet. You can be generous with the mixture! You will probably have some left over, which is okay.

Sprinkle breadcrumb mixture on the fillets, make sure you get the sides.

Bake 15 minutes and serve with lemon juice.

-------------------------------------

Here are a few pointers on meal prep, but geez guys, this one is so easy your husbands could do it...without the pointers.

Here is the butter/mustard/honey sauce

And me beating the crap out of the nuts. I REALLY smashed mine, you don't have to go to such lengths. I was afraid my daughter would see a nut and go into hiding...... under her bed or in the basement.

And this is the breadcrumbs mixed with the nuts and parsley. Really, this is quite easy.

And here is my daughter brushing the fillets. If your husbands don't think they can do this, show them this picture.

And then the plated food. Sorry guys I was sooooo hungry I took a few bites before I realized I hadn't taken a picture for you to see.

*burp*

Excuse me!

MY MOM!

2009-05-10T09:22:00.004-06:00

Happy Mother's Day Mom!

Let me tell you about my mom.

She is beautiful..... Inside and out!

And she loves you, no matter what.

No matter what covers a LOT of territory with me! I'm a tough one!

-----------------------------------------
My mom is my rock! She is what keeps me steady through the hard times.
My mom also has Lupus, as did her father.

Four years ago I was diagnosed with a spinal cord tumor. At the time of diagnosis I was close to being paralyzed and had been having medical issues for years. My doctor thought I had MS, I thought my life was falling apart.

After multiple diagnosis, tests, frustrations and no real answers a full body MRI showed a spinal cord tumor in the T9-11 area of my back. It had compressed my spinal cord into almost nothingness.

I was diagnosed on the 13th of August 2004 and went in to surgery on the 20th.

My mom was with me through it all.

My mom, with her own hard medical problems, went to the Dr visits, was scared right along with me, and stayed with me in the hospital for 9 days after my surgery. Those nine days were no picnic. My mom, not the nurses bathed me. My mom helped feed me. My mom helped me to the bathroom. My mom was the nurses dream come true.

Because the tumor had wreaked havoc on the nerves that operated my lower body, I had to relearn a lot of things.

My mom was there through all of that too.

She helped me learn how to sit up again, how to stand, how to WALK!

Then instead of sending me off to a rehab center to continue my care. My mom, my wonderful mother. Took me home to her house and took care of me for another 9 days.
She did this wonderful thing for me and at the same time she made sure my 4 year old daughter was fed, clothed and taken care of.

In all honesty I went home too soon. But caring for me was taking its toll on my moms health and on my dads nerves. Because what I failed to say above, is that my mom was sick the whole time she was taking care of me. That sickness, because of her Lupus and running her body down while she took care of me, hung on for MONTHS and MONTHS and in the end caused permanent health problems.

But my mom pushed through it for me.

Then after I went home, struggling with a walker and cane in a two story condo. My mom checked up on me. She stopped by, she called. She wanted to make sure I was okay.

I lied to my mom a LOT during those times, because I was rarely okay, and ya know, I think my mom knew I was lying. Moms are like that.

But she respected my independence and helped me as much as I would allow.

My mom is a ROCK!

Happy Mother's Day MOM
I love you!

CRAZY DAISY NUTHOUSE

2009-05-08T19:43:00.005-06:00

Birthday parties are soooooo much fun.

There is nothing like having nine 9 year old girls running around playing tag, or doing this!

See, it isn't only boys who do "dog piles", apparently nine year old girls do too.

I'm almost afraid to look but I think that is my little one on the bottom. *shakes head*

Oh and they also poke each others cupcakes,

And throw grass in each others hair,

And eat almost thee large pizzas.

There is so much I am learning about nine year olds that I never knew.

The biggest is that they wear you out.

*yawn*

DOWN BY 7

2009-05-04T10:15:00.001-06:00

35 days down, and countless more to go!

But I’m down by 7 pounds.

This past month has been a struggle. I’ve had a few days when I wanted to break down, eat a cardboard box…dipped in chocolate of course… and then have a good cry.

Those days suck!

So last night, while I was working out….to Hillary Duff, Demi Lovato and other pre-teen groups….. (I couldn’t find MY ipod so I was forced to go through my daughters dresser and borrow)

I had a nice thought.

I’ve been at the exercise/ cut calorie part of my diet for 34 days and my back and legs have held up. I’ve not had any huge issues that have put me down for the count.

Last night I upped my exercise routine and today I STILL FEEL GOOD!

In fact, I actually forgot to take a pain med today and while my back is very tight and hurts, it is manageable.

I can’t express to you how happy that makes me. My biggest obstacle in loosing weight in the past, is that every time I tried to add the exercise component to the diet my spinal cord rebelled and I had to stop exercising.

This time I approached it in a different manor and my body seems to be holding out.

Today, along with upping the exercise, I will cut calories a little bit more.

Wish me luck!

9 YEARS AGO

2009-05-01T20:52:00.003-06:00

Nine years ago tomorrow I received the most precious gift a person can ever receive. She is everything a mother could want.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY!

MY NEPHEW!

2009-05-01T11:05:00.007-06:00

I am a proud Aunt...16 times over, and it never ceases to amaze me how each of my nieces and nephews are so very different in temperament and personality. And I love each of them to pieces.

This little guy was a creation of my sisters and she has graciously allowed me to share him with you. He is 2 years old and makes me laugh ALL of the time.

The picture I am going to share with all of you today just says it all. It also is one of those "uniting" moments for parents everywhere.

Because we have all had those moments when our brains ask the questions:

Do I laugh first, or should I cry?

Here is the moment.

By the way, my sister laughed...then cried.

He somehow managed to get his hands on some Desitin and paint it everywhere.

Man I love this little guy!

CAREFREE

2009-04-28T18:39:00.005-06:00

Oh to be this carefree and young again!

And to be able to jump a rope over and over again without calling 911 for assistance.

Stupid tumor!

I guess I can't blame it all on the tumor because I'm not sure how well I could jump a rope over and over again before the tumor grew.

I do know that jumping rope was one of my favorite things to do when I was my daughters age.

So I did something stupid.... I gave in to peer pressure...from an 8 year old.
"Come on mom, I bet you can't do THIS while jumping rope."
I bet I freaking CAN!

So I did.

I received some really fun electrical jolts to the brain while doing it, but boy was it worth every minute of showing my child that I wasn't THAT OLD and THAT disabled.

BOURBON CHICKEN

2009-04-25T18:19:00.005-06:00

Okay, here is Saturday's Dinner

BOURBON CHICKEN (Serves 4)

2 lbs Boneless Skinless Chicken Breasts
1 T Olive Oil

1/2 Cup Water
1/3 Cup Soy Sauce
1/4 Cup Apple Juice
1/4 Cup Brown Sugar
1 T Cider Vinegar
2 T Ketchup
1 Clove of Garlic (Or 1/2 T minced Garlic- the bottled stuff)
1/4 tsp Ginger
1/4 tsp Crushed Red Pepper Flakes= mild (1/2 tsp= medium spicy & 3/4 tsp= hot)

3 Cups of Rice (Prepared as the box directs)

Heat oil into skillet. Cut chicken into small bite-sized pieces, add to oil and cook until they are a little browned.

While the chicken is cooking: Add the rest of the ingredients, in order, to a bowl and stir until they are well mixed. Pay attention to the crushed red peppers and decide if you like your chinese food mild, as we do, or if you like it with a bit more spice.

Add sauce mixture to the browned chicken.

Bring to boil and then reduce heat and simmer for 20 min or until most of the sauce has reduced.

Cook the rice while the chicken is simmering.

Try not to slobber on yourself while you plate your food.... BTW, the chicken goes on TOP of the rice.

AND HERE are the steps as I made it tonight!

If the chicken is in bite sized pieces it is much easier to chew and swallow them. I've found that my child inhales her food, even at age 9. I have also found that I really hate giving the Heimlich maneuver, thus the smaller the better at our house.

Here is the sauce all mixed up and waiting on the chicken.

After you add the sauce to the chicken your life gets really really boring for the next 20 minutes. I started cleaning the kitchen, which is another reason to add to my... reasons why dinner should be faster than 30 minutes... mentality.

And here is some rice. What more can I say?

When your chicken is done it should look like this. Not much sauce left. At this point my nut of a child walked in and said "Eeeew, what is that smell?"

She is soooooo ungrateful. But wouldn't you know it, she snarfed it down in 2 minutes flat.

And here is the end product. Yummy, yummy in my tummy!

DINNER TONIGHT

2009-04-24T21:12:00.009-06:00

Oh look what we had for dinner.

Yogurt Chicken with a side of smashed potatoes.

Once again the idea was from Pioneer Woman's website.

It took much longer than my recommended 30 minute meal prep, but both Emmi and I loved it. Plus it was diet worthy.

Notice I used a lunch plate. It is the key to any diet. The smaller the plate the more food it looks like you have. We have banned dinner plates for a while.

Maybe forever!

I'm thinking I want Bourbon Chicken for dinner tomorrow, I'll see if I can post that as the recipe for this week. Emmi has a dance competition tomorrow so I may be spending 16 hours sitting in a H.S. auditorium...... grooooooaaaan. The things we do for our children.

I love you Emmi!

I even love you enough to sit in a H.S. auditorium for 16 hours.

DIETS STINK

2009-04-24T14:57:00.003-06:00

If one more person asks me "What diet are you on?" I swear I'm going to loose it.

What happened to the days when you just freaking exercised and cut back on calories. Now there are all of these names to diets: The no carb diet, the drink liquid diet, the points system...eeeek

Oh and don't forget all of the clubs, ya know Jenny and the "watcher's" people.

I'm sorry but I can't see myself spending money to loose weight.

If only there were an Oreo diet.....

Oh crap, my mind just wandered again.

My minor is in nutrition and so the whole "cut this out of your diet, and restrict this from your diet.." mentality just kills me. If you are going to keep the weight off and you really love Oreo cookies...as I do, then you can't eliminate them or geez, 6 months from now you will be sitting in a closet somewhere with 12 boxes of cookies and 4 gallons of milk...just going to town on those things.

That is a scary image for anyone.

So I'm on day 24 of the ummm.... I'm just eating like I should.... diet. I need to find a name for this thing. Anyway, I started making changed back in January that would prepare me for this. Things like; buying whole wheat pasta, lots of fruit and the non-plastic margarine... the olive oil stuff is wonderful.

Then on April 1st (that fools day) I started the full fledged cutting calories and exercise thing. So far I have lost 5 lbs and have noticed that I'm loosing inches.

Having spinal cord damage really makes this all the harder to accomplish because I can't just get on an exercise program, I pretty much have to create one myself and find things that don't put me down with nerve pain for weeks. So far so good.

Have I told you how much I detest tumors...... well I do!

I digress.... So back to the diet.

Any ideas for my diet name?

QUOTE OF THE DAY

2009-04-23T21:07:00.002-06:00

If thou wilt needs marry, marry a fool; for wise men know well enough what monsters you make of them. - Hamlet

Well, Mr Shakespeare, maybe that is why I have not married.

I will have to poder this quote for a bit longer.

EASY MEALS

2009-04-22T08:44:00.005-06:00

My daughters eye rolls give me headaches.

Ya see, we started a new thing at our house this year. Every week or so we try a new recipe and decide whether or not it is worthy enough to be added to our meal list.

We have different tastes, so sometimes this isn't easy.

Some of the criteria are mine, some are hers.

Mine:
1). No peppers. I detest red, green, yellow and hot peppers and don't know why people have to add them to EVERYTHING!
2). It must be easy. I have this rule in my house. If it can't be started and in my mouth within 30 minutes then it doesn't get cooked during the week. I leave these meals for Sunday. It isn't because I'm lazy (well, maybe a little because). But come on, I'm a single mom who works two jobs to pay the bills. I'm exhausted by the time I get home and really don't want to spend too much time in the kitchen.

Hers:
1). No chunky tomatos, no peppers, no onions, no weird "fishy" things, no BBQ

She has lots and lots of NO's

I love to cook though. I mean I LUUUUUUUVVVV to cook. When I was like 8 or 9 I would bake cakes for my family and try and make my own frosting with water and lots and lots of powdered sugar (I don't recommend trying this). My parents, bless their hearts, put up with it when they didn't have two nickles to rub together. Somehow I never remember there not being cake mixes and cookie ingredients hanging around.

I think they put up with it because I made good cookies.

I still do!

But lets not talk about that, because cookies are my downfall....diet-wise.

Back to the cooking!

*sigh*

We have tried lots and lots of recipes. Some from my "critter friends". My favorite was a pulled pork that was made in my Christmas present... I bright shiny crockpot. Some we found off of the recipe zarr website. The bourbon chicken one was to die for. Others have been from family, friends and peeps at church. http://www.recipezaar.com/

Lately almost all have been from the Pioneer Woman. Her name is Ree, she is weird like me, and she loves to cook.
http://thepioneerwoman.com/

Sometimes my daughter even helps with this.

I say sometimes because she thinks she needs time to play outside with friends.

Playing outside is soooooo overrated.

So a miracle happened last week. My daughter saw the recipe of the week sitting on the kitchen island. It was BBQ (which my daughter hates) Meatballs (which my daughter would elope with if I let her). She groaned, rolled her eyes and then noticed where the recipe was printed from.

The Pioneer Woman.

My daughter paused, if I listened close enough I probably could have heard the thinking going on in there. Here is what it said:

"blech, my mom is going to do BBQ, but geez, look at that picture of those beautiful meatballs. Ick, BBQ, but geez, the last recipe from this Pioneer woman was yummy yummy."

And then she said. Those look good mom, but is it real BBQ sauce?

I almost rolled my eyes... but remember... headaches!

The miracle is that she helped cook them with me. My daughter who won't touch anything that remotely resembles BBQ sauce actually MADE the sauce for these meatballs.

And she loved it. As did I.

But more than loving the BBQ meatballs, I loved making them with my daughter. Over the past few months she has slowly joined me in the kitchen to make these new meals.

We have had a blast doing it too.

ANIMAL HOUSE

2009-04-19T19:20:00.003-06:00

Today was a serious animal house around our place.

We took the rabbits outside and let them hop around for the first time this spring. They had a blast, as did my daughter. The bunnies are having some serious shedding problems, so I now look a bit fuzzy, but it was fun.

The cat joined us outside for a while. He got tired of being sniffed and chased by the rabbits, so he escaped back inside.

Smart cat!

IN OUR YARD

2009-04-13T11:28:00.002-06:00

Spring has just begun at our house and we have a few fun things in bloom.

Our magnolia tree, that I planted last summer has busted out in pretty blooms.

Here is a close up.

We also have our forsythia bushes that are bright yellow with blooms and our daffodils are also blooming. We bought some daffodils and planted them last year only to have them come up really really small. When I looked on the package I noticed that they were mini daffodils. *smack head*

Oh well, they are still cute.

There is more blooming, and many more getting ready to bloom.

I love spring!

IT'S FINISHED

2009-04-12T10:07:00.002-06:00

I'm totally exhausted, but it was so worth all of the frustration, aches and pains.

Our pantry cabinet has been refinished.

Today I was able to move the food out of my island and into the big beautiful thing.

It is beautiful, isn't it?

WHAT A CUTIE

2009-04-04T21:43:00.002-06:00

Oh, just look at that face!

Hard to resist not reaching through your computer and kissing all over that, isn't it?

And this little girl, Daisy, is so soft.

So very soft!

Don't you wish you had a soft Easter Bunny for yourself?

(The writer of this blog does not promote purchasing a rabbit for you or your children for Easter. Rabbits, while cute, are not easy to take care of and they produce a dumpload of poop pellets a month...no lie....)

FRIDAY NIGHT DINNER

2009-04-03T11:36:00.001-06:00

Okay, I've now started a separate blog where I can post recipes for those of you who are asking for them.
Here is the Friday recipe for today. With any hope I can post the pictures when I get home.
http://nuttycook.blogspot.com/

WELL WORTH THE WORK

2009-03-31T18:45:00.008-06:00

For those of you who have purchased a home, do you remember the walk-throughs? Those thousand or so homes you walked through, looking for the exact home you want to pluck you life-blood into. And you have this list with like a bazillion things on it that you are hoping this house has.

My list had lots and lots of things crossed out.

In fact there were only a few things on my list that my house had.

A roof that didn't leak was one of them.

Anywho, on the day I moved into my home I noticed two things.
1. The garage was being held straight by a 2x4 (last summer we had to tear out and put in a new beam to fix that problem)
2. My house didn't have a pantry.

Now who in their right mind, if you are female, builds a home without a kitchen pantry? I don't know, but the lady who built this place didn't put one in.

Oh there is room for a pantry, there just isn't one.

And since I really didn't want to build one (I have already put up too many 2x4's in this home) and I really needed someplace to put the canned goods, (the island just is too far to bend down, plus things get lost down there. I swear, it is worse than the dryer at eating things.

So I decided to find and buy a stand alone pantry. The problem was two-fold. The ones that were the size I wanted cost close to a thousand dollars, and the ones in my price range were too small.

I decided to get creative and go looking for anything with doors and shelves.

I found this! It is an armoire with shelves inside.

And while it was pine, like my cupboards, it had been antiqued. So there was all of this black stuff on the wood that made it look old. It also made it look too dark next to my cabinets. (cupboards, cabinets...same thing)

After trying a sander, which would have taken two plus weeks, and some varnish stripper, which did nothing to the black stuff... I once again got creative. I tried Goof Off!

If you have never used the stuff, you are missing out. It removes weird stuff from almost anything. I love to use it when I have those painting oops.

So here is what the Goof Off did.

After scrubbing till my arms wanted to fall off, and going through two bottles (so far) of Goof Off, I decided to stain one door and see how it looked.

See the black still on the inside of the Armiore. The door has been stained.

The door on the right has been stained, the one on the left has not. I still have to take the black stuff off of the sides and inside then I will stain the whole thing. I can't wait for it to be finished.

I'll post a picture when it is done.

THE DREADED DENTIST

2009-03-30T21:39:00.003-06:00

I have this love/hate relationship with my dentist. He is by far the best dentist I have ever had, but I seriously hate to see him.

I had to psych myself up, yet again, to go see him today and have two cavities filled. I use the word "psych" because I have a long standing history of canceling about 30+% of my appointments because I just can't get my head around to wanting to be tortured for hours.

I hate having other peoples hands in my mouth... OH how I hate it.

Today though, I didn't expect to be too bad. I went in last month and had a bigger cavity filled and it wasn't any big deal, so I figured I would go, have them fill the two little puppies and be on my merry way.

Little did I know!

I was there for almost two hours and it was the second worst dental appointment of my life (my wisdom teeth being the worst--I'll tell that story someday). I hurt so bad after I left that I wanted to curl up in a ball, call my mommy and cry.

I was really shocked at how awful the pain was, because lets face it, I suffer through some pretty hardcore pain everyday without pain meds and I figure my pain threshold is pretty high these days.

I have to take Emmi to the dentist tomorrow for an x-ray, but I can honestly say it will take my the full 6 months to work myself back up to going for my cleaning.

Oh the pain!

MOTHER NATURE

2009-03-26T12:46:00.004-06:00

I Swear, mother nature suffers from a personality disorder of some kind.

There I was last Saturday, sitting next to a river, watching ducks ignore the 30 or so loaves of bread that the kids had thrown at them. My face was getting sunburned by the 60 degree weather and the sub sandwich I had just picked up was getting stale.

I go home and till the garden, admire my little tulips that have poked their heads through the sandy soil.

And now I'm sitting here in my freaking office watching snowflakes fall.

How wrong is that?

To make myself feel better I'm including a picture of the tulips that bloomed on my kitchen table a few weeks ago. Maybe someday soon I will see some of these cuties outside my house.

SPRING IS ALMOST HERE

2009-03-18T09:26:00.002-06:00

This week has brought spring fever to our home. It has been in the 60's for the past few days allowing the little one to play outside more. But the best part is that yesterday I spent a few hours in the yard cleaning up all of the winter debre and cutting off all of the dead stuff from plants. While i did that I noticed all of the tulips and daffodiles coming up and other bushes starting to get leaves. It is so exciting!

The really weird thing is that I was too lazy last fall to pull up all of the annual plants Emmi planted in the flower gardens and two kinds are coming back. Her pansies from last year survived our winter and are blooming again and the snap dragons have stared new green growth. I can't wait until we have blooms all over the yard.
Happy almost spring!

CHARITY'S HOMEMADE POT PIE

2009-02-18T09:52:00.006-07:00

Because you all asked for it, here it is. I never had a recipe for this, I just made it, but because I have been asked...like a hundred times...for this I finally wrote it down as I cooked and measured things out. So here you go, enjoy!

Charity's Homemade Pot Pie
Makes 1 large Pot Pie
By Charity M.

2 frozen pie crusts in pie tins (or make homemade if you like)
2 Large Chicken Breasts (Cut into bite sized pieces)
1 ½ - 2 Potatoes (Cut into bite sized pieces)
1/3 Cup Chopped Onions
1 16 oz bag Frozen Peas & Carrots
½ Can of Corn with water drained (or Frozen Corn)
2 Cans Cream of Chicken Soup (10.5 oz)
1 stem of Celery, chopped (Optional)
1/8 Cup of Water
Parsley
Salt
Pepper

* Set pie crusts out to thaw.

* Chop Potatoes into bite sized squares and place in a boiling pot of water. Cook until tender. Do not let them get soggy, they still need firmness to them. Drain the water and set aside.

* In a large skillet with a small amount of oil, add chopped Chicken and chopped Onions. When chicken is fully cooked add Water, Celery, Peas, Carrots and Corn. Cook until the vegetables are thawed and tender stirring frequently.

* Stir Cream of Chicken Soup into the vegetable mixture, add parsley, salt and pepper to taste. Cook until the mixture is warm.

* Pour into one of the pie tins then use the second pie crust for the top of the pot pie. Make 2-4 slits in the top for venting.

* Place the pie on a cookie sheet before baking to prevent spillage.

Bake @ 375 degrees
25 minutes (If the filling is still warm when you bake it)
45 minutes (If the pie is refrigerated before cooking)

HAPPY VALENTINES

2009-02-14T18:14:00.004-07:00

I've never been a big valentine's day person, Maybe it is because I never seem to have a significant other to celebrate with, or maybe it is because it is a stupid holiday where the stores bank on the notion that men should show the women in their lives how much they mean to them. I think that is called EVERY DAY.

However, every year for the past 5 years I have held a Valentine party for my nieces and nephews. It started out as just a babysitting gig, then as Emmi got older we turned it into a sleepover party. A night when parents could ditch their kids and ummmmmmm, weeeeeell. Do what parents do when their kids are not there.

Every year we have made tie-dye shirts, watched a movie and had fun (afterwards I downed the Tylenol). This year because my back has been giving me fits since October and I didn't think I could handle it, I decided not to do the sleepover.

So last night 6 of my nieces and nephews came over to party. We made fleece blankets, decorated cookies and watched Iron Man. It sure was a fun night.

OH MY GOSH!

2009-01-19T14:17:00.002-07:00

I haven't posted since October.
Oopsy!

Things have been busy and rough since then so I can see how that little slip up might happen. So here is the end of the year in a nut shell.

Halloween was fun. Emmi was a witch and looked so very cute. We did the trick or treat thing and now the bowl is sitting on the counter and hardly ever gets eaten from. It is sad, pathetic and true that every year before we go trick or treating again I have to throw away the previous years candy.

Then there was Thanksgiving, which was at my parents house and yummy as always.

This holiday season was a weird one. It really didn't feel like all the other holidays. I don't know if it was because I was so very busy planning parties or if it was my health or maybe the weird stuff in the world, but I just wasn't in the mood for the holidays and was glad when they were over.

Emmi had a great Christmas and even with the horrible icy weather we managed to get to my parents house and see the cousins. She received some very fun toys and games while I was blessed with a new computer that WORKS and some jewelry.

Hope your holiday was a good one.

BEFORE & AFTER

2008-10-15T11:29:00.003-06:00

When I bought my house the family room had these awful colors painted. The previous owner must have liked gold because she painted the wall in a two-tone gold and then painted the baseboards and moldings in a flake gold color.

I knew it was going to be a nightmare to paint the baseboards, but if I only knew just how bad I probably wouldn't have repainted. The baseboards took one coat of liquid sandpaper and three coats of paint. The walls took two coats, although I may have to put a third coat on the gold wall. Here are the before and after pictures, I think the room looks tons better and once I pick out some wall hanging I think it will look wonderful.

BEFORE

AFTER

OOPS IT'S WINTER

2008-10-12T15:01:00.005-06:00

I looked at the calendar, and then looked again to make sure it was right.

October 12th, and we got dumped on with 11 inches (so far) of white stuff.

Snow in October is common in Utah, but usually it is just a skiff of snow, or and inch or two that melts really fast. But THIS is ridiculous!

The snow plows aren't out because, well, they haven't hired people yet to drive them, after all the calendar says October 12th.

Emmi calls this her "flower snow-girl" She is a combination of the two seasons we are in. Fall and winter. Up until last night we still had tons of flowers blooming.

The pictures above were taken this morning when we had maybe 5 inches.
Happy Fall-Winter

HAPPY FALL

2008-10-10T09:57:00.006-06:00

It has been a little while since I have updated the blog. September just went past too fast. October is now here and Fall has arrived. School is going well for Emmi. Midterms came home and she is getting A's in all her subjects except for one subject.

Next week I'm taking off on a min vacation. I need a break from work, church, etc. The stress has really gotten to me and it is time to unwind. I plan on painting the family room and getting rid of the depressing dark gold color. I'll post pictures if I remember to. Then next weekend Emmi and I are going out of town for a few days. I'm excited for the break.

Last night we pulled up our garden and picked all of the tomatoes. They are now stacked in the window and hopefully will finish turning red. My mom is a great tomato stacker and somehow manages to stach them 12 high. Me, on the other hand, manged to line them all up and then when I started on row two the first row started falling off. LOL! It must be a art. Someday I'll have to have her show me how to stack tomatoes.

Emmi came home yesterday with her new school pictures. They are posted below. Good thing they took them early in the year, because in the past two weeks she has lost two more teeth. She now has the "pumpkin smile" again.

RESULTS

2008-08-29T10:58:00.003-06:00

Okay, so I had my MRI on Tuesday and that afternoon they called with the results.
Everything is normal, no new growth of the tumor.
I'm so happy I could dance.
Thanks everyone for your support.
Yipppeeee

4 Years

2008-08-20T10:15:00.003-06:00

Today is an anniversary of sorts for me. Four years ago today was my surgery to remove a Nerve Sheath Schwannoma Tumor from my spinal cord.

Part of me feels like the last four years have been the longest in my life, and part of me feels like it has gone by pretty fast. The first year and a half was the hardest, and even though I still have really really bad days, it is so much better than it was in the beginning. The best part is that I'm here, I can walk and I can live a mostly normal life.

The pain is still there. The nerve pain in my left leg is irritating, the numbness is annoying but it is the muscle pain in my back that has the capacity to bring me to my knees. But most days I can deal with the pain with little problems and I'm grateful for that.

With Emmi being older now and able to help out so much more than she could at age 4 it certainly helps. She can help with chores around the house so that I don't overdue it. (even though I still sometimes do)

I haven't had my MRI for the year, so I can't post that there is no regrowth, because I don't know that yet. I need to call and schedule the appointment, but part of me is always frightened to find out. It is that part of me that is afraid that Dr. Bryson Smith wasn't able to get it all, or that I have another one growing somewhere else. That is my worst fear.

I'm sure everything is just fine... it has been for several years. I just have unnecessary fears.

I'll let you all know what the results are in a month or so when I know.

But until then... Happy Anniversary to ME!

MY FIRST RAG QUILT

2008-07-20T14:50:00.007-06:00

So what did I do with my yesterday, when Emmi was at day camp. Well, I could have gone to see a movie that was NOT made by Disney, or taken myself out to eat at a nice restaurant. But I didn't. Instead I spent 5 hours making my first rag quilt.

On Thursday a lady in the neighborhood demonstrated how to make these at a church thing. I took the instructions, mulled them over in my mind and came up with this:

The top picture is the back. Normally it is only one color, but I really wanted to have a design on it too. The front has squares of ladybugs, purple pokadots and pink checkers. It turned out much better than I thought it would and took WAAAAY longer than I wanted it too, but it is so very cute. Emmi has pretty much decided it is hers. I THINK NOT!

THE COW BUNNY

2008-07-16T21:41:00.003-06:00

So we got another bunny. *snort*. We just couldn't help ourselves. We picked her out and bought her a few weeks ago but she wasn't ready until this week.

She is a broken black mini rex or as we call her "THE COW BUNNY". Her name is Daisy the cow bunny.

Pokey doesn't know what to think of her, and freaked a little when we put her in Pokeys cage (Pokey doesn't really use her cage, she just stays out in the play area). So I went and bought Daisy her own cage and now Pokey is fine. But for a while we will be keeping Daisies cage locked. We need to let them get used to each other before we let Daisy hop around the play area with Pokey.

She is soooo cute huh?

DEATH BY CHOCOLATE

2008-06-16T07:56:00.004-06:00

Em and I went to Chili's on Saturday to have dinner and ordered the Molten Chocolate Cake for dessert. It wasn't the first time we have had it, in fact it was the whole reason why we went to Chili's in the first place.

After eating dinner we gobbled the thing down in record time and giggled the whole time.

Then we sat back and groaned from the pain of "Death by Chocolate". But ya know, What a way to go.

There is the guy on YouTube that shows you how to replicate the cake. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hz4jSM8D5o4

I haven't tried it yet, but it looks promising. However, the cake we had last night also had caramel on it and his didn't. Hmmmm We will have to try it someday, but for now I know where to go to get my chocolate fix.

BIRTHDAYS AND MORE!

2008-05-18T18:37:00.003-06:00

It has sure been a busy month.

My little girl turned 8 years old on the 2nd.
Can you believe it?
I sure can't.

We had a friend party full of lots and LOTS of screaming second grade girls (shudder).
Then came the family party which we combined with her baptism on Saturday the 3rd.
It was such a beautiful day and many friends I had not seen in a long time came.

Then the rest of the month started passing so fast that I feel a bit shocked that in 5 days my daughter will be out of school for the summer. WHAT????

We have spent almost every weekend in the yard planting bushes, flowers and killing weeds. The garden is finally in and hopefully will grow. (keep your fingers crossed)

The weather is finally warm. This spring so far has been very cold. So the past week of warm weather is very very nice.

It has been a good month.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY EMMI

I NEVER THOUGHT

2008-04-15T12:54:00.004-06:00

I grew up in the age of electronics and consider myself pretty savvy. I'm the one my co-workers look for when they can't get the system in the auditorium working, or their computer isn't doing what they want it to.

So I never thought the day would come when I would think of myself as electronically challenged. Well, that day came last week when I bought my daughter an ipod and wanted to give it to her with songs already loaded onto the thing.

The ipod itself didn't stump me, although the instruction manual was the shortest thing I have ever seen come with an electronic item before. It was the stupid itunes website that got me. Downloading the software was a complete and total joke. I'd download it only to try and purchase a song and have it tell me I needed to download 5.2 or higher, since I had just downloaded 5.6 it seemed kind of pointless, but I did it again anyway, just to please the big-wigs at Apple. But I kept getting the same error.

I figured that all out and then purchased the songs I wanted. The site said they had been downloaded and the little (you ipod has been sync-ed) came up. So I'm thinking. "WOW, and it only took me two hours to get this done" *said sarcastically* Only I spoke too soon. Nothing had been downloaded to the ipod, so I plugged it back in and low and behold a new screen appeared that allowed you to sync the ipod.

It works great now, and I understand how to do it again. But geez, I sure hope the 7-10 year olds struggle with this one too, or I feel really really old.

PICTURES, PICTURES AND MORE...

2008-03-28T19:30:00.004-06:00

It's time for an update on some pictures from the past few months. These pictures are from my "film" camera. It sometimes takes me a while before I get them developed. I do have a digital, but I like the pictures from my real camera better.

Here you go!

Emmi participated in her schools "Reflections" contest this year. The theme was "I can make a difference by..." Emmi titled her picture "By planting Apple Trees". I like the cute squirrel climbing the tree. She took 1st place in her school but didn't place in the next division. Way to go Emmi.

These are of our snow this past January. WAY too much snow. I'm so glad it has melted. We did get snowed on two nights ago and are expecting snow this weekend, but the good thing about spring snow is that is melts in a few hours.

Our Bunny, Pokey, is just too cute.

Don't I wish it was always this easy. LOL! By the way, I didn't encourage this, she did it herself. It was one of the few times she was quiet that day.